Out of the Shadows
by 4thSmalley
Summary: AU, Severus astounds everyone and survives Nagini's attack and has to come to terms with living a new life free from past obligations. However nothing is ever that easy, especially when most people on your own side are against you, and Death Eaters still on the loose. Not Slash, just friendship RL and SS. M for violence in some chapters.
1. Chapter 1, Death

Chapter 1 – Death

**A/N: Before we begin I would like to say a few necessary words. This is my first fanfic that delves into the Potter Universe, so I crave your pardon for any glaring mistakes I may make. I have no Beta readers so I'm going with what I remember from the books/films and limited research. The good thing about writing an AU story is you can put any mistakes down as being intentional differences, ha!**

**Secondly this is not a romance novel; I haven't enough confidence in such matters to make it believable and would most likely lose your interest with trying to make it seem plausible. Also I personally feel that it is our privilege to be able to write fanfic based on popular stories and I would not want the authors to feel that we mistreat their realms, so canon pairings will stay but no more will be added or intentionally insinuated.**

**Thirdly this story is M and will include some graphic injuries, torture (avoid chapter 16) and some bad language. It will also cover some potentially triggering/distressing topics so I'm sticking in a warning in case.  
And finally, no characters of canon belong to me, nor does the universe in which it is set. The idea and events that follow are my brain child but I am merely sharing it for the joy of being able to write fanfic, and not for personal gain.  
And now with those unpleasantries dealt with, onto the interesting stuff!**

**~O~**

**(The above denote a change in time or scene, it's supposed to be an extremely crude snitch or something)**

Snape knew his life was over as he stared into those eyes that glittered with crazed madness, the intelligence that he had once respected was long overridden with the desire to conquer, to rule. He had considered possibility that when he had been sent the Dark lord's summons he was being called to die, but now he was certain he was staring death in the face. The man had been muttering about not being powerful enough, and had decided that it was his fault and had turned to face the spy, with that sickening smile on his face that heralded violence. Before Snape even had the chance to think of a spell to protect himself, Voldemort had made a slashing movement with the Elder Wand. For a second Severus thought he had been mistaken and was dismissed, but as he struggled to draw breath and blood started to seep down his throat he knew he was wrong.

"Kill, Nagini," Voldemort murmured almost lovingly to his snake.

Snape in his time had suffered more pain than almost everyone he knew, but having Nagini repeatedly lunge at his throat and rip further into his soft flesh was beyond agonising. Even his evil master had ensured that his followers were never struck in the same place twice whilst being tortured as it was not good for continued torture. It was much more productive to move on to a new spot so more pain was induced whilst keeping the victim relatively conscious. With his last few minutes fast approaching, Snape was determined not to die a coward and didn't scream out, he would not give the sick man the pleasure of listening to his pain filled screams. Voldemort didn't even acknowledge that small act of defiance as he stepped around the body and _through_ the slowly spreading pool of blood, all the while muttering to his snake.

'_No, not a snake. That thing passed the limit to be called a snake ages ago. That is an abomination,'_ Snape thought grimly. For the first time in his life he decided that he didn't like snakes.

His pain-filled musing was interrupted by a not-so subtle scuffling from nearby and Potter moved into view. Severus had always wanted to die alone, to be able to react to his final moments however he wanted and not need to worry about anyone else seeing his emotions. Now that he had to face death he was quite annoyed that his last moments were going to be spent with the boy who constantly took delight in defying him and making his life a misery. Or more of a misery that it could have been at least if he hadn't had to deal with the Potter brat.

'_Nice of you to come and gloat over this,'_ Snape thought darkly, before realising he still had a chance to help stop Voldemort. Despite helping getting the sword to Potter, there was still more that he could give to help bring this mad war to a favourable conclusion. There was so much more that he needed Potter to know, and seeing as no one else could pass on the crucial information Dumbledore had entrusted to him, he had to act fast before it was too late. Focussing his shredded concentration, Snape poured anything he thought could be useful into a steady stream of tears.

His mumbled pleas for Potter to take them seemed to be unheard for a few seconds as the trio just gaped at Snape crying. If he had had more energy he would have shouted at them for their idiocy when it was pretty obvious he didn't have all day. Eventually Granger moved into action and passed a vial for his tears to go into.

"Look, at, me," Snape was desperate for his final thoughts in this life to be of something good. And out of the dwindling options he latched onto that pair of eyes.

Lily's eyes stared back at him, showing devastation yet mixed with confusion and hatred.

_No, not Lily,_ Snape sighed, sad of being robbed of that final comfort.

And he breathed no more.

**~O~**

Snape decided that death was certainly not all it was cranked up to be. Everyone had always said that death was supposed to be somewhere that was warm and loving and free from pain, guilt and all other unpleasantries associated with life. Even if you were destined for hell and eternal damnation all the crack pots insisted that you would burn for eternity in fire. But for Snape the first two things he became aware of was the immense amount of pain that his throat caused him every time he breathed. Secondly that he was incredibly cold and uncomfortable. As he managed to register more sensation he could tell that he was lying on a cold stone floor in a dark and unheated room. Beyond that he knew little else as he was unwilling to open his eyes.

'_Why do you have to breathe when you are dead?'_ Snape mused as another wave of pain crashed through him from his ruined throat. Severus hadn't given much thought to death in recent years, it could occur at any moment so winding himself up over an inevitability did not seem like a productive thing to do. However breathing once dead did seem a bit redundant, but he slowly pushed that thought away after a while. It was something he could not change so he let it go, unlike a lot of things he had held onto and brooded over in life.

Shortly the pain in his throat dulled a bit, probably due to the neurons firing constantly for so long that either his brain was becoming immune to the signals or the neurons had shut off. Either way, Severus braved the next stage of death and opened his eyes. What he did not expect was for death to look so much like Hogwarts, or more specifically like a disused large storage room in Hogwarts.

'_Typical, even in death I cannot get rid of this place. Maybe I am in hell, I wouldn't be surprised,'_ Snape would have sighed but refrained from doing so in favour of not aggravating his neck.

Deciding that death was not going to be an experience he would enjoy, Snape tried to move and get up. However it quickly became obvious that trying to find a way out of this depressingly dark and cold room was impossible as he couldn't move a limb. If he could have, Snape would have screamed in frustration.

'_Is this all my life has lead up to? Losing Lily to Potter Senior and then to the Dark Lord, fighting two wars and then a rather painful death to just spend eternity staring up at a ceiling?! I do not accept it!' _Snape's distress finally won out on his conservative mind and he let out a shout of rage.

Or at least it was intended as such, but all that came out was a violent rush of air with a low pitch growl.

In the next few moments Severus was in so much pain he hadn't realised that he wasn't the only witness to his anger. From the far side of the room he heard a gasp and a rustle of a body standing. Only once the person came into sight did Snape drag his brain out of the haze of pain and back to the present.

'_Oh great, Longbottom made it to the afterlife too. Things really _are_ starting to look up,'_ Snape thought with his usual amount of sneer injected into his internal monologue.

Neville looked completely shocked as he gazed down at Snape, seemingly rooted to the spot in confusion. It was only when Snape took another breath deep enough to aggravate his neck and caused him to wince in pain that the student was spurred into action.

"Professor McGonagall, help! Someone come quickly!" Neville shouted as he stumbled towards the doorway.

'_So even Minerva managed to wind up in here, maybe she can keep Longbottom occupied for long enough for me to get away. Unless I'm stuck as just a head,'_ the sudden horrifying thought caused Snape to wrench his head around.

For a few seconds he was able to override the torrent of pain that assaulted his head as he confirmed that he had made it into the afterlife with a body. Strangely he was also lying in a line of other people who had not awoken to this nightmare. Severus hadn't been able to recognise anyone in the few moments he had managed to raise his head, however he was certain that any of them would be better than spending forever with Longbottom. But then seeing as the boy had spent the majority of the year leading a rebel group within Hogwarts, he should really be more respectful of the unlikely hero.

Snape was starting to give up on trying to figure out death and was slowly succumbing to the sheer amount of pain in his neck when more commotion heralded the arrival of more of his fellow inmates in hell.

"I was just in here getting some space and trying to burn some happy memories into my mind of those who had died. Then there was a noise that sounded like someone crying out, and I realised he wasn't dead!" Neville's voice echoed around the room, not quite drowned out by the tramping of many feet and whispers of confusion.

"Severus? Severus can you hear me?" the worry carried in the voice caused the usually quiet Scottish accent to leap prominently forward.

For a while Snape thought about pretending to be unconscious like his yet to awaken neighbours and wait it out until they had left. He agreed with that plan and played dead for a few seconds but then the person knelt by him and accidentally jostled his shoulder, set off the fires in his neck again. The pain forced him to weakly scrunch up his face and drag his eyes open slowly.

'_This isn't going to go well,'_ Snape decided eventually once he had taken stock of the change of scene above him.

Neville was standing to his left, nervously peering down at him. To his right McGonagall had knelt down and had been the one to jostle him for a reaction. And out of the corner of his eyes he could see a gaggle of other people who were trying to see him. Many of them were a bit bloody and injured themselves, whilst they all were dishevelled and covered in dust from the battle, and they all wore matching looks of astonishment and fear. And hatred.

'_So even in death I'm going to be condemned for trying to help, just typical,'_ Snape closed his eyes in what was hopefully a dismissive manner and decided to wait a bit longer for answers. However it seemed that death wasn't going to play his game.

"Longbottom, go and alert Madam Pomfrey to get a bed ready for Snape and for her to get as many bandages and blood regenerating potions as she has spare. Some essence of Dittany and antidotes to snake venom will also be needed," McGonagall ordered and the pair of clumsy feet staggered off.

"You aren't going to die that easily," McGonagall muttered only to Snape as she cast a spell and levitated him off of the floor and towards the infirmary.

'_I thought I already had,' _Snape thought wryly, with a hint of panic. He was starting to become seriously confused, but the sudden increase in pain created by the movement of his injured body caused his mind to shut off and he dropped into unconsciousness.

**A/N: So what do people think? I have got a general story line up to chapter 21, but beyond that I am pretty much going to be winging it so I will listen to suggestions, may not use them but they are welcome. Reviews will be very much appreciated, although I am terrible at replying to each one I shall try to start doing that. If there is enough interest I shall be posting the next chapter in a week (or earlier if there is lots of interest).**

**If it registers the changes, previous readers please ignore any alerts as I am simply going through and doing some housekeeping. It seems that text breakers are not translated from a normal word document when they are uploaded, so I am going back and putting them all in again!**


	2. Chapter 2, Life

2 – Life

Of all the things that had happened today, the news that Snape had survived was the most shocking for everyone. And that was saying something, after they had witnessed Harry rise from the dead and defeat Lord Voldemort, seen Molly Weasley hex Bellatrix Lestrange into oblivion and a fistfight between giants. Not to mention witnessing the sheer amount of death and destruction first hand that would undoubtedly haunt their nightmares for years to come.

In the immediate aftermath of the battle those who had championed freedom and the Light were almost giddy with joy at the sight of many Death Eaters fleeing for their lives, chased by the plant and stone sentinels. The humans had retreated inside and haphazardly created some semblance of normality in which to rest and try to recognize the fact they had won. The Death Eaters and werewolves who had perished in the assault were simply moved out of sight into empty dank rooms within the dungeons, to be removed for mass burial later on. Those who deserved an honoured burial were put in an antechamber near the Great Hall, and it had surprised many when the trio had disappeared and returned with Hermione levitating Snape's body in front of them. Harry had been adamant he was on their side and had had to sit in front of all the remaining supporters and explain what had truly gone on. A few people were still confused but no longer voiced their displeasure at Snape being amongst their loved ones.

As it was the decision had saved his life, as Neville's fortuitous presence in the room gave Madam Pomfrey enough time and warning to stem the bleeding. For almost four hours she tirelessly worked on the ruined arteries, trachea and vocal chords of the once despised teacher as she tried to save his life. The few other healers who had been seconded to the Hospital Wing alternated between helping the other injured people under their care and helping pass bandages and fetch odd potions that Pomfrey randomly called for. Despite the fact the area around his bed had been screened off, the whispers about the severity of the damage had already made most people wonder why Madam Pomfrey wasted her time trying to fight a losing battle.

But despite the seemingly unbeatable odds that faced them, the healer was successful and managed to stabilise Snape's condition, and only left his side once she was certain he would pull through. As soon as Poppy emerged from attending her most severe patient she was accosted by McGonagall who pulled her into her office nearby and thrust a cup of sweet tea into the healer's hands.

"I wouldn't dare try to drag you away from your patients in here, so I thought I would try to bring something fortifying to you," the headmistress said kindly.

For a while Poppy simply smiled gratefully as she slumped in her chair next to the fire and silently drained the cup.

"More?" McGonagall didn't wait before refilling the cup and adding sugar and milk.

"You don't need to mother me," Poppy said quietly with a smile.

"You've never had to work on such a desperate case, and I wouldn't hesitate to say you didn't hold back whilst trying to save his life," Minerva said determinedly.

"True, I honestly didn't think he was even alive when you brought him up. Just to look at the amount of damage done I would have said that it was impossible for him to have lived for five minutes after the attack, let alone six hours," Poppy said with a shudder.

"Will there be any lasting damage?" McGonagall lowered herself into another chair across the desk from the healer.

"His windpipe and arteries have been healed and should not suffer any lasting damage, but there was extensive damage to his vocal chords, and obviously to the exterior skin. The bites extended from his neck and down the right side of his throat onto the collar bone, so depending on how well they heal he may also have pain moving his right arm for a while. If he survives the night, which he may not Minerva; he will at least bear considerable scarring for life. Perhaps he might not speak again," Poppy said regretfully.

"Time will tell, but if he does pull through this he shall forever be in your debt," Minerva said gently as she stood and put a reassuring hand on the healer's shoulder.

She then left to give the tired witch some space and quickly checked in on the many carefully screened off patients. Snape was looking even paler than usual and decidedly wrong in the pale hospital pyjamas. McGonagall slowly stepped closer and was pleased to see that the considerable amount of bandaging around his neck and throat where still mercifully white, a testament to Pomfrey's hard work that the bleeding had stopped. As the man hovered within the drug induced healing coma his face was completely relaxed and devoid of the strained scowl it usually exhibited, making the man seem a lot closer to his age than the stress usually made him look. Minerva noticed that her misunderstood work colleague was barely breathing, and silently wished that he would continue to do so for a long while yet.

Opposite the Potions Master, Remus Lupin was also unconscious and tucked securely into bed. He had been trying to defend his fiancé from a Death Eater who had thought it was acceptable to sneak up on a lady who was already distracted by two other foes. The resulting duel between the two Order members and three Death Eaters had been spectacular but ended suddenly when a blasting curse went awry and hit the ceiling, burying both Tonks and Lupin. In the hour's grace that Voldemort had given them to rest they had been pulled from the rubble, but Nymphadora was already dead and Lupin had suffered multiple fractures and the bruising on his brain was a cause for concern.

The further down the Hospital Wing that Minerva travelled the less serious the injuries became until it was simple observation that was needed. To see all the beds full and knowing there were more injured sitting patiently in the Great Hall made McGonagall almost weep in empathy. But she pulled herself together and went to check on those still standing and celebrating.

**~O~**

_Snape was standing in the midst of a darkened field, the long grass swayed in an unfelt breeze and brushed against his knees. There was no moon and very few stars to light the scene, so he remained still in the middle of this unknown meadow and waited. Being alone and unable to see a possible attack heading for him should have made the Death Eater nervous, but the atmosphere of the area somehow calmed his mind and allowed him to look up at the skies. A shooting star blazed almost lazily across the skies and before he could stop himself Snape had made a wish._

_Cursing his foolish lapse into a silly childhood habit Snape glared down at the grass that continued to sway next to him. The habit of wishing for anything had long been stamped out of this man, but before he could mentally berate himself further he noticed something new. A path was slowly appearing in the grass next to him and wound like a river through the meadow. Resolutely he stepped forward and followed the path._

_An indefinite amount of time passed, and although it felt like hours had passed the stars continued to shine and dawn never seemed to arrive. The wind, which had been untouchable to start with suddenly caressed Severus' cheek and made him shudder. The smell of blossoms and summer sun assailed his senses, making him take a deep breath and revel in the lack of pain such a simple action caused. For a while he tried to figure out why the sudden smell had caused a wave of sadness to wash over him, and when he realised he stopped dead in his tracks._

"_Lilies," Severus whispered mournfully._

"_Severus."_

_Impossibly, she was suddenly there sitting under an oak tree in the middle of the meadow. And equally impossibly the day had come and was instantly noontime._

"_This is a dream," Snape stated, only half angry at the fact._

"_How can it be a dream, when you can hold an only partially predictable argument with the item of your dream?" Lily said with the same little smile she always bore when she was right._

"_But you are dead, and I most likely am too. So is this death for real then?" Severus sighed and was starting to get truly irritated at the games Death was playing._

"_No, you are still in the middle of both plains and cannot pass over to me just yet," Lily clarified for him._

"_If I cannot pass over yet, that means I have to go back and face everything," Snape pulled a face._

"_It won't be that bad," Lily held her hand out and pulled Snape down to sit next to her in the shade._

"_You seem to forget that I am a traitor and have a cell with my name on it waiting for me at Azkaban," Snape shot back._

"_Things are never just black and white. I would have thought you of all people would know this Sev," Lily turned her gaze from the sea of flowers and grass and to her childhood friend._

"_Who would stick up for me? And what would they possibly hope to gain from it? I don't think I could stand being lorded over by a third person," Snape said in defeat._

"_Severus, there are many people who would defend you after what you have done to try to help destroy Voldemort. And stop thinking like a Slytherin for once, not everyone only acts out of selfish intent. Harry knows you have a good heart and would stand to help you, and would not expect to have you in his debt for it. Remus and Minerva would also do the same," Lily said with certainty._

_Snape did not reply but looked out from their shaded spot and at the swaying flowers. How could he say what he felt to his long dead love, and voice his fears? She was the mother of the boy who had given so much already, the boy who hated him._

"_Don't worry, you will not go to Azkaban because you are needed at Hogwarts," Lily put an arm around her friend and hugged him._

"_What's going to happen to Hogwarts? Hasn't enough happened to the place," Snape snorted._

"_Not everything is over yet, and you will be needed to fight on the right side before the world is truly at peace," Lily said calmly._

_Snape didn't say anything, just sighed and dropped his head._

"_Brave heart, Severus. You have my thanks for protecting Harry. You should know that you are never alone and we will help you," Lily placed a gentle kiss upon Severus' cheek._

_Snape closed his eyes in longing, and the world went black once more._

**~O~**

The Hospital Wing was mercifully quiet once more, as the majority of the bed's occupants had been discharged. Many of the students that had been injured had returned to their dormitories and were sharing in the joyous relief of being alive. A few had been taken home by concerned parents who both praised their bravery for fighting and also berated their foolishness. After two days only two permanent occupants remained in their beds, and they both were located closest to Madam Pomfrey's office.

Poppy herself had just finished her hourly inspection of the two and was pleased with their progress. Lupin's condition had finally settled and he was resting easily, no longer in any danger from the pressure that had built up on his brain. However the damage had been severe enough that he would most likely be in a coma for a week until his body felt it was recovered enough for him to awaken. Snape was also stable and the horrific wounds to his neck were healing satisfactorily, but he was still much paler than he usually looked. Sighing quietly the medi-witch softly stepped over to the window and looked out to the grounds to soothe her nerves.

Although the damage to the grounds had been devastating, those who were fit enough to join in with the task of clearing up the mess had already done a sterling job. The courtyards had been cleared of the huge piles of rubble and the most pressing damage rectified to the bridge and walls in the courtyard. From her position at the window Poppy could also see Grawp dragging huge trees clear from the wrecked forest to be used for furniture within the school itself. A few teachers hung in the air on broomsticks and were repairing the damage done to the roofs and outer walls of the castle, and seemed to be enjoying their work as they chatted and laughed. Pomona's greenhouses had lost a lot of glass during the confrontation and had been quickly repaired to help salvage some of the rare plants within their walls. Everyone was trying to bring things quickly back to normality, almost as if they were trying to forget what had happened, or to attone for the fact they had survived when so many of their friends had died.

'_Survivor's guilt,'_ Madam Pomfrey thought grimly as she turned back to the room. She knew that Remus at least would also suffer from it, and she was determined that he would not have to face it alone.

**~O~**

_He was running from the Marauder's after yet _another _attack that had been unprovoked. He was running through the grounds with their laughs trailing after him, tears of humiliation stung his cheeks and not for the first time he wished someone would listen to him. Before he knew it he was deep within the Forbidden Forest and completely lost, not that he wanted to return to the castle any time soon. Snape threw himself down at the roots of one of the towering trees and sobbed at the unfairness of the world and dreamed of revenge. _

_Suddenly one of the roots moved and became a huge snake. Snape had never feared the beast that was his house's emblem, but the sheer size of this beast terrified him. The monster coiled around his legs, looked at his face almost thoughtfully before it lunged at his throat._

The violent flailing from his dream carried over into reality, but where merely a poor reflection of his subconscious attempts, like tiny ripples of a plash on a pond. Snape was only able to feebly shake his head and his limbs barely stirred the covers that were laid over him. In his delirium he tried to scream out, but no noise emerged from his mouth.

Suddenly his intense nightmare was shattered by hands on his shoulders and a soothing voice filtered through his terrified brain.

"Severus calm down, you're safe now," the voice continued repeating similar phrases.

Eventually the confused man quietened and fearfully cracked his eyes open. A familiar face was hovering above him looking both relieved and concerned. As he tried to organise his memories another female appeared in his sights and gently forced a potion to his lips.

"It's nice to see you back amongst the living," Madam Pomfrey said as she disappeared the vial and looked down at her patient.

Severus tried to talk to the pair but only a strangled gasp emerged from his lips.

"Don't talk, you suffered extensive damage to your vocal chords and we need you to rest your throat as much as possible to maximise the chance of you regaining your voice," Poppy said gently as she smoothed the covers of his pillow.

Snape simply looked at them with confusion and a questioning look. For a man used to schooling his features so no emotions were revealed it was a strange exercise.

"We have no idea how you survived the attack from that snake," McGonagall started. "Potter, Weasley and Granger recovered your body once the war was over and brought you to the hall where we had left all those who had died during the attack. Longbottom happened to be in the room at the right time when you suddenly regained consciousness and gave him the biggest fright of his life. Actually all of us were shocked when we realised he wasn't just hallucinating, and Poppy was the only one who could muster a coherent thought and saved your life."

"Any healer would have done the same," Pomfrey started.

"No, I've seen a few healers come undone by smaller wounds in a crisis, you truly did something amazing," Minerva insisted.

Snape was far from satisfied by their lack of information as to why he was back, but nodded his thanks anyway. The potions had started to take effect and he was feeling less hindered by the pain in his throat and his lack of energy. Slowly he explored the rest of his body and was happy to discover that it was only his throat and back that had been injured. He continued to ignore the two women as he gingerly lifted his left arm and checked his Dark Mark, and was immensely relieved to see that it had faded back to the state it had reached between the two wars. He was slightly gutted it had not completely disappeared, but he could live with it in its faded state now that its creator was dead.

He gently sat up a bit to see more of the room, much to his visitor's annoyance.

"Really Severus, you shouldn't move unless you have to," Minerva chided.

In reply the man simply rolled his eyes and glared enough to make it known he did not want to be pampered.

'_This is going to be a long recovery if I can't get them to understand me',_ Snape thought bitterly before he had an idea.

Firstly he mimed putting a cup to his lips, and Poppy trotted off to go get a pitcher of water.

'_Success!'_ Severus smiled almost imperceptibly. He then mimed writing on the palm of his hand and looked expectantly at the Transfiguration teacher.

Minerva understood immediately and quickly conquered a muggle notepad and pen. "It's more practical than a scroll and quill, this will last much longer."

_**Smart idea. How long was I out? **_Snape quickly wrote before accepting a glass of water.

"It's been five days since Voldemort was destroyed for good. Yes we are all trying to get used to saying his name now that this whole debacle is finally over," McGonagall said with a small wince of discomfort at using the name.

_**I don't see that catching on any time soon**_, Snape smirked as he wrote.

"Probably not, but it is one of the ways we are trying to look strong after the battle. We lost too many good people and we have to rebuild quickly," Minerva said quietly.

_**How many? Who?**_

"About forty people died, including Nymphadora Tonks, and Charlie and Percy Weasley," McGonagall stifled a sniff.

Snape sat there looking uncomfortable at the news. Although he was devastated by the losses he hadn't got half the mental attachment that Minerva had cultivated and so wasn't even close to getting damp eyes.

'_The curse of being the Spy, the one they have all despised for years. Even if I did feel sorrow at their deaths they wouldn't acknowledge it was a true emotion, only a sham to make me fit in more,'_ Snape thought bitterly.

The small amount of effort expended in the exchange had fully worn the Potions Master out, and he eased himself back down onto his bed.

"People will be delighted to hear you have woken up, no one was really sure whether Poppy was in time," Minerva said gently as the two women retreated at his silent dismissal.

Once they were sure that he was asleep again Poppy turned to her friend.

"Has there been any news from the Ministry?" Poppy asked quickly.

"None, they know that Severus survived and is being treated here, but there hasn't been any official summons or warrants for arrest put out for him. I'm hoping that considering the letter I sent to them explaining his part in the battle they might delay acting for a few months. They might even just drop his case altogether," Minerva said with more certainty than she felt.

Madam Pomfrey looked at her and knew that there was false hope in the last statement before gently patting the Headmistresses arm and returning to her patients. Professor McGonagall paused for a second longer at the doorway to the Hospital Wing and looked back at the unconscious man on the bed, before heading off on other duties.

**A/N: I wasn't sure how many people were supposed to die in the battle, so I made up the number. I've decided Fred should survive as I liked his character and I detested the part where he died, so I killed off the others instead. **


	3. Chapter 3, Facing Reality

3 – Facing Reality

**A/N: First off cheers to Celelas for the first review of this story! I'm grateful to everyone who has followed or favourite this story, but I appreciate the act of actually penning your thoughts even more.  
I do intend to update once a week still, as that will give me time to figure out where the story is going and give the chapters I have written already a second look over and a rework. Thanks again to anyone reading my work!**

Snape was not aware if anyone came to visit him over the next couple of days, he certainly hadn't had to feign sleep to get people to leave him alone at least. Now that he had a grasp on the concept of time and reality again he began to take note of the passing of the sun and moon when he awoke. It was early morning on the third day since he had regained consciousness, and eight since the Battle of Hogwarts, when he jolted awake from a bad dream and could not fall asleep again. He had been lying in the same spot for far too long, and Poppy had kept a watch on him like a hawk to make sure he didn't get out of bed. He had been subjected to her running around like a headless chicken making sure he had anything he could possibly want so that he had no excuse to get out of bed. Now he was heartily sick of it and wanted to do something to regain a sliver of independence.

Considering the hour, he simply settled for going to the bathroom alone. Getting out of bed was easy enough and after a few moments his legs stopped shaking and he could support his own weight. His feet felt slightly spongy as if the sensation in his skin wasn't working properly. It was almost as if he had just gotten rid of a bad case of pins and needles and the nerves in his skin weren't fully back to normal. He had noted it a couple of times previously when he picked up a book or glass but this was the most inconvenient instance. Like the other times, the sensation returned properly after a few minutes and he was able to carry on with life. He hadn't brought up the problem with Poppy because he didn't want her to fuss around him, but Severus just assumed it was an after effect of Nagini's venom that either would slowly leave or wouldn't.

There was no moon to light his way along the room, and someone had inconsiderately taken his wand so he could not cast a spell to light his way. Surprisingly though he could recall the layout of the Hospital Wing so clearly he did not need a light to navigate the beds, curtains and chairs. Although he spared a thought for the irony that he spent his life trying to avoid being sent here, he knew the room intimately anyway, he was too engrossed in his act of rebellion to seriously think about it. Within a minute he had reached his goal and shut the door behind him gently before too much light from the torches could shine into the ward and alert the medi-witch to his plot. Now that he had reached his target destination he realised that he wasn't feeling half as bad as he was expecting.

'_It seems that Nagini's venom hasn't done too much damage,'_ Snape mused as he moved towards the shower cubicle, pointedly ignoring the beginning pain in his throat that heralded the cocktail of potions in his system wearing off.

As quietly as he could the man showered and changed into a darker pair of pyjamas that were stored in the cupboard before taking as deep a breath as he could manage with his ruined throat and looked in the mirror. The man that stared back at him did not look at all familiar.

Despite the days of sleep he had gotten recently he still looked incredibly tired with black bags under his eyes, and his skin generally had a tired and grey look to it. Snape had never been a vain man when it came to his appearance, an especially valid point when compared to Lucius Malfoy's immaculate presentation that betrayed hours of preening, but his current complexion startled even himself. He could imagine that his now washed and clean hair would have looked pretty horrendous before this act of rebellion, and even now it still looked wrong to how it usually looked after a shower. Six days worth of stubble had grown on his chin which did not help matters, as he had never wanted to grow a beard and now he had no means of removing the unwanted hair.

'_I suppose there is no harm in trying,'_ Snape thought and he concentrated on the spell he wanted and attempted to direct his magic to the task at hand.

For a few seconds nothing happened and sweat started to break out on his face. But after the third internally shouted command, the hair on his face suddenly fell out.

Snape grinned in triumph. He had been able to master casting most of the spells in his repertoire silently, and the simpler half without a wand as well, however he had never been able to cast that spell without a wand before and he was quietly rather impressed with himself.

'_If anything will prove to them that I can be discharged then that will,'_ Snape was still grinning at the thought.

But then his gaze travelled from his smooth chin to the mass of bandages at his throat and the grin quickly faded. For a long time he stood there and deliberated his next move, whether to remove the bandages or to just decide he had accomplished enough today and go back to bed. He knew that it had been too long since his last dose of pain relieving potion for the act of removing bandages to not hurt, but his fear of what he looked like underneath them almost outweighed the anticipated pain.

'_I know where Poppy keeps the potions, I can just take one,'_ Snape nodded at his decision and raised his hands to his throat.

Finding the end of the bandage took a while, and slowly unwinding it from his neck took even longer. But eventually Severus stood there with nothing but a few pads covering his neck. He closed his eyes, braced himself, and pulled the pads away with a wince as they pulled at the tender flesh of his throat.

'_Now that I'm this far in, I'm not sure I can look,'_ Snape winced at the thought, both at the blatant cowardism it showed but also and how afraid he was. _'Come on, this isn't getting us anywhere.'_

To help the decision Severus imagined the worst that he could, that the wounds had not healed and he would have half his throat missing. Cheered on by the thought, he opened his eyes. The damage was not as bad as he had feared; or at least wasn't as noticeable as he had feared. The majority of his neck from his just above his adam's apple down was a mess of red angry slashes, but above that there were only a few errant gashes that would probably not even be noticeable once he was dressed in his usual attire with a high collared shirt. There was definitely one set of fang marks just under his right jaw that would be visible, but the majority of the students would be too intimidated to look close enough to see them even if they did sum up the courage to look at him.

'_At least my shoulder is easing up a bit, it would not have been easy to work with that hampering me. But am I likely to get my voice back? I doubt there is much research Poppy could do on recovery from Nagini's bites, even I'm not sure what species that monstrosity was. Although Arthur might be able to help…'_ Severus mused as he carefully rewrapped the bandaging and snuck back to his bed as quietly as possible.

**~O~**

The glares that Madam Pomfrey shot Severus the next morning left him in no doubt that she knew about his night-time excursion out of bed, and that she thoroughly disproved it. However, he was slightly more cheerful in himself now that he knew he could face his scars. Poppy was preparing to give him a lecture on the consequences of his rebellious act if something had gone wrong when she was stopped by a simple act at breakfast. For the last three days that he had been conscious and had been given food Severus would usually pick at it and only eat a few bites, and Madam Pomfrey had been forced to give him a few nutritional potions to keep his strength up so he healed. Today, however, Snape was quite happily tucking into the porridge mixed with a good helping of honey and was halfway through his orange juice before Poppy had even finished examining Remus. Noticing her confused look, Severus simply caught her gaze and returned a smug one of his own.

'_You might be the healer here, but I've been through enough to know my own body better than your training does. I've been through worse,'_ Snape thought, before realising that he had never come quite so close to death before. There had been a few occasions when the Dark Lord had been in a particularly bad mood and Severus had considered on those occasions that he might actually die under the hands of his crazed master.

Snape shuddered at the memory of his worst torture session. His concentration had been so shattered that he really shouldn't have tried apparating, as it was he had managed it without getting splinched but had landed at the boundary of the school deep within the Forbidden Forest. He had managed to crawl for about twenty metres into the school grounds before tumbling down a steep bank into a stream, knocking himself out in the process. It was only by sheer luck that a centaur herd had been passing at the time and were in a charitable enough mood to haul him out before he drowned (Firenze had admitted to it during his short stint as the Divination teacher). Eventually he had regained consciousness and managed to haul himself back to the castle before anyone saw him, although he was forced to miss two days of lessons due to being ill with 'flu'. He had barred his room with the strongest spells he knew so that even Dumbledore couldn't reach him and only allowed Lottie the House Elf to bring him food. He had made the House Elf swear herself to secrecy years ago when he had turned spy, and she knew the only time she would be allowed to go get help would be if Severus truly looked like he was on the verge of death.

That time she had sorely been tempted, but he was lucid enough through the pain to ensure that he didn't need assistance, and she was forced to leave him to heal himself with his vast array of potions. He had never needed anyone's help recovering from Voldemort's sessions and he refused to change that. No one needed to know what went on, they had only needed the information he could get.

Before he could continue further down that road of grim recollection, Minerva bustled into the ward and made a beeline for him.

'_Here we go again,'_ Snape thought wearily, but was secretly pleased to have a visitor to stop the angry glares he was getting.

"Good morning Severus, how are you doing? I'm sorry I haven't been able to visit for a while, things are incredibly hectic at the moment trying to rebuild the castle," she began as Snape grabbed his notepad from the bedside table.

_**I've been entertaining myself, Poppy will probably fill you in on the details. For some reason I think she doesn't approve.  
How does it go? I see they've fixed the nearby holes in the roof, and there are fewer people coming in with injuries from rubble.**_

"I can imagine what you've been doing, you are looking too well groomed to have just been lying in bed like a good patient," McGonagall smiled and rolled her eyes.

_**Six days! You cannot tell me you wouldn't have tried the same.**_ Snape wrote in his defence.

"You know yourself well enough; if you managed to succeed in your mission then I do not see why we should condemn you. As for rebuilding, everything is going well and I would think that we would be finished by the end of the week in time for the ceremony," McGonagall said solemnly.

_**What ceremony?**_ Snape looked interested at this titbit of news.

"People have decided that it would be good to erect a memorial stone by the lake to remember those who fell during the Battle. And it would be good to have the castle fixed by the time we have people returning to visit," Minerva informed her colleague.

_**I hope it goes well for you**_. Snape suddenly lost interest in the topic.

"You will be well enough to be in the grounds by then," McGonagall started.

_**And who would want me there? Most people who would be visiting would still think me a traitor and I do not wish to anger them. They will have enough to think about without glaring daggers at a Death Eater.**_ Snape tossed the pad to his visitor and scowled.

"Potter has been singing your praises from the rooftop and telling anyone who would listen that you were misunderstood. Everyone within the castle has had enough evidence thrown at them to make them believe it. It's a shame you fulfilled your role so well that people find it hard to believe that you truly were on our side," Minerva said gently.

_**I doubt that anyone will trust me, and even if they did those Death Eaters that escaped will spend every day trying to find and kill me.**_

"You could live in a safe house-," Minerva began.

Snape snorted loudly then winced as the act aggravated his throat a bit.

"Well if you are against that idea then you will just have to accept my job offer and stay here," Minerva snapped.

_**Job?**_ Snape looked at her quizzically.

"That got your attention," she smiled. "We have a few job vacancies going if you were interested. Horace was unfortunately caught in a firefight and died later in the day that you woke up, which leaves us without a head of Slytherin house and without a Potions Master. Unsurprisingly, we have another vacancy in the Defence Against the Dark Arts position. Unfortunately the Board of Governors is adamant I take over as Headmistress, considering what you had to work under last year I think it is a bit unfair that you cannot have the job, but they are in charge."

_**You're welcome to it, personally I found having Albus breathing down my shoulder all year rather insufferable. So which do you want me to take?**_

"Which do you think I was going to offer you? You've been after it for long enough," Minerva smiled.

_**Who would you hire to fill the potions job?**_

"We haven't got anyone lined up yet, but we have got a month to find someone. However I was actually considering asking Remus when he wakes up," the nervous look Severus received from his friend made him pause.

_**Are you confident in his abilities?**_ Snape wondered if she was desperate or had ulterior motives.

"I think he will be sufficiently proficient to fill the role. And if you are worried about everyone knowing his secret then the two of you will be in the same boat and could perhaps help each other out. Also with him here you could teach him and perhaps improve the Wolfsbane draught you give him," Minerva said easily.

_**You're hiding something,**_ Snape smirked.

"And he will be alone now that Tonks has died, having him close and busy will be good for us to keep an eye on him," she finished with a small shrug.

_**I'd still keep advertising for the positions in case.**_

"But two of them are already filled, you're taking them," Minerva protested.

_**And how can I teach if I cannot talk? Granted I can do silent casting but that is useless when it comes to giving instructions or discipline.**_ Snape pointed out bitterly.

"Poppy is quite sure you will be talking soon, so there is no need for the melodrama. And trust you to think of discipline," McGonagall said cheerfully.

'_Too cheerfully, she is lying,'_ Snape thought gloomily.

Minerva seemed to pick up on his deductions and quickly rounded up the conversation. Before she left she checked in on Remus and got an update from Poppy, before bidding Severus goodbye and telling him that she would personally escort him to the Remembrance Ceremony in three days.


	4. Chapter 4, Duress

4 – Duress

**A/N: Cheers to AcelinWolf for the reviews! I thought that to celebrate topping 10 follows/favourites I would throw another chapter up early as well as the regular Friday update.**

Poppy was concerned, which was nothing new for her. However the source of her concerns was the fact that what she was seeing was not normal. Increasing over the last few years she had faced numerous people in distressing situations, having lost loved ones or facing severe disabilities thanks to the war. These people had often cried, shouted or frozen in shock, all of them had needed help facing the truth and their altered future.

But Severus? He had woken up and seemed put out by the loss of his voice, but after than he had simply asked for a few potion journals from his room and settled down to waiting. Poppy did not expect him to be the crying type, indeed she had never seen any emotion from this man except shock and anger, but to simply accept his fate like he seemed to be doing worried her. Denying reality was never his style. With the traumatic events that had brought him to her care and the lack of his voice should have tipped any sane person into some kind of emotional outburst.

"Morning Severus, how are you this fine sunny day? Looks like tomorrow should have fair weather for the ceremony," Pomfrey bustled around his bed doing her morning scans on his condition.

_**Same as the last few days, do you expect a miraculous recovery of my throat?**_ Severus wrote in reply.

"No need to be snarky with me, I'm just being polite and trying to start a conversation rather than treating you like an inanimate object simply because you cannot speak. Would you prefer me to treat you like some kind of inmate and ignore you?" Poppy snapped back, deliberately trying to elicit a response from the man.

_**Sorry, I just thought it would be rather obvious how I am considering I am still here. I've learnt the consequences of trying to leave your care if you have everyone else on your side, and now that Minerva is Headmistress I know for a fact there is no higher power that would go against you,**_ Snape almost smiled ruefully.

"Thank you. Now, in all honesty, how are you? You seemed to be coping remarkably well with all this," Poppy stared right into his eyes as she asked.

_**I am fine. True I find it infuriating that I do not have a voice but I will adapt. And Occlumency works miracles on keeping nightmares at bay.**_

"That is not a healthy way of dealing with your emotions Severus," Poppy chided him gently.

_**It is how I have dealt with it before, and I shall continue to do so. The only other way I am going to deal with them involves a large bottle of Firewhiskey. And somehow I doubt you will allow that in here**_. Snape smirked and turned to his breakfast.

Admitting defeat, Madam Pomfrey left his bed with a sigh and went to check on Lupin.

**~O~**

Severus couldn't decide what was worse, being stuck in the same bed in the same room and receiving glares from an over protective medi-witch; or being dragged down through the grounds where there was fresh air and sunshine, but a gathering full of people who would glare at you.

'_At least the scenery is different and the air smells of many other scents other than disinfectant. However it is easier to ignore just one person glaring at you. Perhaps I can persuade Minerva that my throat hurts and I can go back?'_ Snape thought desperately.

However that route of escape was unlikely to be useable as Madam Pomfrey had finally decided that he had healed enough for her liking for him to be discharged. McGonagall had arrived at the Hospital Wing half an hour before the ceremony with Snape's customary outfit and had all but marched him out at wand point. He had tried to convince Minerva that it was unnecessary for her to be so paranoid, but she did not believe him which was right of her.

'_I would have even attempted morphing into my animagus form to escape this, despite the fact I have absolutely no idea how to do it. It seems that short of an errant _Avada_ suddenly coming this way there is no way out for me,'_ Snape thought grimly and made a mental note to research becoming an animagus.

The weather was as fine as it had been for Dumbledore's funeral (he had read from _The Daily Prophet _from the comfort of Voldemort's rather dank lair) and seemed to mock the solemn people who had gathered for the ceremony. Despite Dumbledore having been more famous than half the people combined who had died in the Battle, there were more people at this ceremony simply due to the wide variety of people had stood up to Voldemort. The families and friends of those who had fallen were grateful that their acquaintances were being remembered for their sacrifice.

'_And I bet a couple wouldn't mind being able to gawk at the cowardly traitor,'_ Snape snorted at the thought, and was mildly glad that he was now able to do that.

The monument was covered in pale silk drapes that hid the details of the structure beyond revealing it was fifteen foot tall and roughly four foot wide. Chairs had been arranged in a huge semi-circle facing the thin coppice of silver birches in which the monument had been placed, and the small podium that had been erected beside it for McGonagall's use. Rows upon rows of people were already seated awaiting the ceremony to begin, and Severus felt a stab of fear as they approached the assembled crowd of roughly three hundred people. But Minerva had timed their arrival well so that everyone had arrived and were seated, so although their arrival stopped the general chatter McGonagall strode to the front podium and started to address the gathering, ensuring Severus was given some peace.

He remained standing and decided to tactfully linger at the back of the group where his presence wouldn't be obvious and would allow people to focus on the more important reason for which they had gathered, without feeling angry at him for intruding. Although Severus tried to listen, his concentration wandered a bit too much as he realised that he was starting to sense something was wrong. He had been born with a good ability to sense impending danger and over his time as a spy he had honed this sixth sense to the point he could have a decent amount of time to prepare before said impending doom arrived. So he kept a remorseful expression on his face as he strained every sense for the imminent trouble, his eyes constantly flickered over the scene trying to pick out anyone he recognised who might be wanting revenge.

The ceremony was very poignant and the moment when the monument dedicated to those who had fallen was revealed brought more than a few people to tears again. A black column of granite had been shaped into a square pillar that morphed into a sun before rising into an elongated pyramid. The four sided column had been inscribed with the names of every person that had fallen, everyone who had fallen in service of the Light ever since the first war had started. The monument had been enchanted so that each name could be interacted with, and once touched would display more information about that person on the sun section. It seemed that Minerva had been busy contacting the families of each person listed, finding out more about their hobbies, interests and (now-redundant) future aspirations and had even acquired a tasteful picture of that person.

Once the ceremony was officially closed, people surged forward to congratulate Minerva on her newly confirmed position of Headmistress and to closer inspect the monument. Severus was watching the scene with a ghost of a smile on his lips, glad that despite the sadness that pervaded the area they were still able to enjoy simple things. However his peace was short-lived as he noticed four men slowly edging their way towards him. Just looking at them told Severus what they were, even without their customary red robes their attitude screamed 'Aurors'.

"Severus Snape, if you would come with us," the tallest and most intimidating man approached him.

_Great, the one time I go outside I forget to bring some paper and they come to arrest me,'_ Snape quickly pointed to his throat and shook his head to let them know he couldn't speak. He then pointed to them and shrugged questioningly, even though the question was redundant.

"We are here with orders to arrest you and bring you into custody for charges of being a Death Eater," the same man continued.

Snape quickly scrutinised his guards and weighed up his options. They had all obviously been picked as the biggest Aurors available so as to put him off considering the possibility of running. It was an outdated idea, as Severus knew that some of the most powerful or intimidating people he knew could barely reach his shoulder. Regarding two of them, Snape decided that he wouldn't have much trouble taking them out if he had the desire to run; but the other two men, who were thinner and leaner; had decidedly dangerous feelings about them as if they were itching to use magical restraint.

'_I believe that this is a situation I am not going to be able to get out of,'_ Severus thought grimly.

He quickly put up his hands to show that he was going to be compliant, before gesturing to Minerva to signal he wished to talk to her first before they left.

"You can have five minutes, if you haven't reached her before then we shall be leaving regardless," the man said without hesitating.

Conscious of his time limit, Snape wasted none of it by hanging around. As gently but firmly as possible he wove his way through the crowds towards his goal, ignoring the dark looks and impolite mutterings thrown his way. Luckily the trail of discontent left in his wake was starting to attract attention from other members of the crowds, which in turn made Minerva raise her head and glance around at the source of the disturbance. As soon as she saw Severus' expression, and the group of four men waiting distanced from the rest she seemed to understand the hurry.

"I can't believe they've come for you already, you're barely well enough to be out of the Hospital Wing," Minerva whispered hurriedly as she dragged him away from the crowds.

Snape shrugged helplessly, but gave her a prideful look.

"I know you think you are well enough, and if you were staying at the castle I would agree, but you are not in good enough shape to go with them. Who knows where they will take you," Minerva exclaimed.

Snape's look said what both of them were thinking, he was going to Azkaban.

"There is too much of a media storm going on right now about you and the war in general for you to disappear without a trace, they will at least have to have a formal hearing before they condemn you there forever. I will ensure that the Order is well prepared to defend you on that day, and I will not rest until you are back here. Otherwise I'm going to need to find another teacher, and you know I hate interviewing people. What if we end up with another Gilderoy?" Minerva smiled.

Severus simply looked gratefully at her and gave her a small bow. When he straightened again, he firmly pressed something into her hand.

"Your wand, Severus? Why would you give me this?" Minerva was confused at the sudden display of trust.

'_How exactly am I supposed to mime out that I do not trust them to lose it whilst they detain me? I'd rather have you look after it than a biased guard,'_ Severus thought. After a moments thought he simply gave up and hugged her to the surprise of everyone watching (even himself), before making sure she saw his scowl at the four men waiting for him.

"I think I understand, I'll keep it safe for you until you return. I'll also make sure that nothing of yours is touched so that you can pick up exactly where you left off," McGonagall said with a heartfelt smile.

The two of them strode towards the four men and Minerva fixed her most intense frown upon them.

"I realise you are all here on orders, but I am telling you now that your superiors are wrong to suspect this man. He was a genius at hiding his true allegiance and his actions helped win this war, more than any of my contributions. I expect to hear that he will be given a fair trial soon, and if an owl does not arrive within a few days with that news I am going to personally make things very difficult for the Ministry. Are we clear?" McGonagall said with such vehemence that even Severus was impressed with her.

"Crystal, Professor," one of the thinner men piped up, and Severus stifled a sneer as he recognised a former pupil still trying to suck up to a teacher.

"I'll see you soon and have your wand ready for your return," Minerva quickly conjured another notepad and pen for Severus before checking the Aurors had caught the implication of her words.

The four men seemed confused by the items as Severus pocketed them, but they made no comment as they moved to flank him. Despite their presence there being meant as a deterrence to stop the man resisting arrest, Minerva couldn't help but see the scene in a different light. Severus seemed determined to leave without making a scene and was striding along with his usual presence, his head held high. In contrast the four Aurors were made to look sloppy and hesitant in their alert and defensive stances that forced them to look like servants following a King.


	5. Chapter 5, Azkaban

5 – Azkaban 3,600

Severus had been right in his grim musings that he was not going to enjoy this enforced vacation from Hogwarts. The Aurors had been grudgingly cordial whilst on the school grounds and were decent enough to allow him to freely walk to the school gates. However as soon as they crossed the threshold a clenched fist to the back of the skull sent Severus crashing to the ground, stunned both from the blow and also that the attack had come so suddenly he had not even sensed the impending danger. As he lay on the ground the largest of the group knelt next to him and bound his wrists behind his back with manacles that were too small for his wrists.

"Get up scum, we aren't on holiday," the one who had been trying to suck up to Minerva snickered.

Snape realised what was expected of him, with his hands tied behind his back they expected him to roll around in the dirt for a bit before they would drag him to his feet and mock his futile attempts. Deciding to beat them at their own game, Severus calmly rolled onto his back before sitting upright and fluidly rising to his feet, a small smug grin on his face. Seeing that their game had been spoiled by someone who had obviously had too much experience of being treated in such a way, the Auror who seemed to be in charge of the group lazily punched Severus in the face, causing him to fall over again.

"Oops that was terribly clumsy of you, would you like a hand?" the man said with mock sincerity and offered a hand down to Snape.

Severus glowered at him and repeated his manoeuvre so that he was again on his feet ready to face another attack. This time it was brown-noser's turn, and Severus was more than ready to face the attack. Thinking he was safe amongst his colleagues the undistinguished man with oiled black hair strutted forward and attempted to knee Severus in the groin. However, such a move required him to be too close to the restrained man, and Severus did not waste the opportunity. Snape easily dodged the knee and swerved around the clumsy attack before landing his own. Severus smirked with satisfaction as this time it was an Auror lying on the floor, clutching a bloody and broken nose and groaning in pain.

"Smith, he attacked Collins!" the man who had been staying out of the exchanged said angrily.

"You're right Philips, I think we need to teach this Death Eater a lesson. Daniels, would you like to do the honours?" Smith said with a delighted look on his face.

'_You really walked into that one,'_ Severus mentally berated himself as the largest of the group stalked forward with a raised fist.

**~O~**

Another routine day was in progress in the Ministry of Magic. Enough time had lapsed since Kingsley Shacklebolt had been hastily declared Minister for Magic that the usual hubbub after such an event had settled down. The immediate changes that had occurred had been implemented, argued over and details refined to satisfy enough people that outcries died out. There was still a lot of discontent over the sudden push for acceptance of benign werewolves and such 'dark creatures' but the majority of the workers in the Ministry had settled into their routines once more and didn't think much about events outside of their job remits.

Which is why the sudden appearance of four Aurors dragging a black clad figure across the atrium of the Ministry building caused everyone to stop in their tracks and stare. The aurors were all at various levels of dishevelment and were sporting various bruises, however each looked triumphant as they marched towards the lifts. The fifth man kept his head down as he was frogmarched across the hall and seemed oblivious to the stares that the group were gathering.

"So what have you been doing Smith?" a brave person called out from the assembled crowd.

"We've been doing our job, arresting dangerous criminals to keep you safe at night. You still working on that public announcement system?" Smith spat at the man.

"Dangerous criminal? You caught Stan Shunpike chatting up the ladies again?" the heckler continued, to the amusement of the other Ministry workers who were watching.

"Shows how long you've had your head up your arse if you cannot recognise the fact that this is _Severus Snape_," Smith crowed in triumph and forced the figure dressed in black to turn and raise his face to the crowd.

"Merlin's Beard, you actually caught one for once," a woman's voice exclaimed.

"He looks worse off than you guys do," someone else commented, noting the fact that the majority of Severus' visible skin was covered in bruising or blood from his split lip.

"Naturally, he wouldn't give up without a fight so we had to overpower him," Smith said as he tried to sound nonchalant about it.

Severus snorted loudly at this and gently wriggled his hands that were now slippery with blood, and received a warning glare from Smith who hurriedly finished off their session of showing off and ordered the group to resume their parade to the lifts.

"It's a good thing that snake had a go at your throat so we are saved from your lies and pleas for mercy," Smith snarled as he shoved Snape into the empty lift first.

"Shame it didn't finish you off, save us getting our hands dirty," Collins snickered.

"Wish it had," Snape rasped out to the astonishment of the others, mainly because that simple act of talking ripped enough pain through Snape's throat that he actually winced in pain. Throughout their revenge session outside of Hogwarts gates he had never even blinked as they beat him, and now they could see that he was actually in pain.

The rest of the lift journey passed in silence, only broken when other people attempted to enter their lift and Smith smugly announced that it was too dangerous for them to try as they had a dangerous criminal with them. Their behaviour only worsened as they finally reached their destination at the department where criminals were processed before being sent to Azkaban. Severus was eternally grateful that the witch that met them at said department didn't seem at all interested in exacting revenge, and merely started filling out the necessary paperwork.

"Name?" she intoned, obviously well versed in this routine.

"Severus Snape," Smith sneered.

"Are you still determined to rub this in that you have to answer for him?" the woman snapped.

"He can't speak, a snake ripped his throat out," Smith laughed gleefully.

"Shame it didn't get the same chance with you," Snape almost wanted to laugh aloud at the look on Smith's face, but had to settle with an uncharacteristic grin.

'_I like this woman, shame she is chained to a desk and not doing the intelligent jobs that Smith seems to have bagged,'_ Severus thought.

"Age?" the woman continued as if there hadn't been an interruption. Severus held up the required number of fingers and she jotted it down.

"So much damage at such a meagre age," Smith drawled in contempt.

That seemed to be the last straw for the witch and she quickly stood and fired off a charm at the group of assembled Aurors. Philips and Collins flinched automatically, but Smith and Daniels just looked angry. However when Smith tried to voice said anger nothing came out of his mouth as he silently ranted at the witch.

"That should make this process a lot easier. It's pretty obvious what charges you are being brought in for are, so I can fill that out without us having to play a game of charades to figure it out… What's that expression for?" the woman stopped and looked curiously at Severus.

'_Well this is going to be difficult to ask her why she is being nice when I cannot speak and my hands are bound behind my back… I really don't want to worry them by trying wandless magic here when that fact could save my life at a later date in my cell…' _Severus was trying to figure out how to get his thoughts across when the witch almost seemed to read his mind.

Severus took a closer look at the woman in front of him. She was probably around five foot nine inches with short spikey blonde hair that reflected her no-nonsense and practical personality and her eyes were a shade of blue that projected a disarming aura of innocence. Severus guessed that she was newly qualified at twenty three at the oldest, and had been shunted onto the desk work due to lack of opportunities to progress to the field, or that she had earned this work as a reprimand. But the most unusual aspect about her was the fact that she seemed respectful of Severus, in an almost wary defensive approach rather than a naïve trait. She seemed to have inspected Snape to the same degree and looked like she had decided to answer honestly.

"I have some training in healing, and it is pretty obvious to me that you haven't been released from a healers care until recently. Also you look pretty terrible so I highly doubt you would have been able to deal out so much damage to four other men, especially through physical violence. Besides Smith is a prat who would use any excuse to get back at a criminal under his care, especially if they couldn't fight back," the woman glared towards the four men who were looking increasingly confused, worried and angry. "Now, I need to take an inventory of your items before we have to take your photograph, then you will be taken to Azkaban. Please empty your pockets and then change into these, and please do not show that I misplaced my trust by attempting to escape," the witch said with a dangerous undertone to her mild voice as she charmed the manacles open.

Severus bowed his head slightly in acceptance and thanks of her decision whilst rubbing life back into his hands. He quickly set about emptying the pockets of his robes, which did not take long as he only possessed the notepad and pen, a couple of galleons and carried a pain reducing potion out of habit.

"You might want to drink that now, instead of leaving it in storage for however long you are going to be at Azkaban," the witch noted once she had seen the label on the bottle.

_**I will most likely be there for life, you know the laws. However I've been in worse scrapes so I'll manage without it and it will do me good to have something keeping me on my toes in there,**_ Severus wrote matter of factly before turning his attention to his clothing.

He hated the thought of having to bare his skin in front of these people, but he knew that the options were to do so willingly and at his own pace, or suffer the humiliation of the Aurors doing it themselves. Severus sighed at the lack of options and the further lack of dignity left to him before pulling his cloak off and folding it neatly on the desk. The witch shrank it, recorded it and placed it in a box and waited for the next items of clothing. Snape glowered slightly as his specifically tailored and enchanted Potions Master robe disappeared into the box next, and he reluctantly passed his white shirt over after it.

The four Aurors had given up their futile attempts to shout their objections and were simmering with rage in the background. But once Severus bared his back they were instantly distracted from their anger by the tapestry of scars that covered every inch of his back and upper arms. The witch could also see a lot of scars covering his stomach and chest, looking suspiciously like knife wounds and burn scars. But what caught her attention were the scars that covered his throat from Nagini's attack, and the thought of the amount of pain that must have been inflicted by those wounds made the witch avert her gaze. Severus could feel their eyes on him and quickly threw on the pyjama like shirt that would be his clothing for the next indefinite amount of time. Snape tossed his shoes onto the counter and then his trousers which he was fast in replacing with the Azkaban regulation trousers and thin plimsolls.

"Right, I think those four have calmed down enough that we can probably release them to take you for your photograph and then you will be on your way. I hope that things work out well for you in there," the witch said honestly.

Severus quickly scrabbled for the paper and pen that was still on the desk as the Aurors approached. _**What is your name? Thank you for your civil attitude to me**_.

"I'm Leah Jenkins," the witch called to him as he was dragged down the corridor by his guards.

Severus was quiet and compliant when they shoved him into the photographing section, which almost seemed to anger them that he wasn't giving them a reason to use restraint. Snape was actually quite smug that his mugshot, that would undoubtedly be plastered across the front of the _Daily Prophet_ tomorrow, wouldn't be filled by a screaming insane face like those of all the other Death Eaters. He was sure his would look resigned but refined and determined, certainly something to make people stop and think about the man who was being sent to Hell.

With that done Smith bound his hands with another set of manacles, but this time in front of his body, before muttering a few words and Severus was jerked out of the room by the portkey.

'_Smart disguise, being bound in them means you cannot let go and drop out of the transportation early,'_ Severus thought before he slammed into the ground in a cold and dark room.

"Hands," a man stepped out of the shadows and dragged Severus to his feet.

Severus watched carefully as the man rotated his right arm and the guard jabbed his wand into the skin about level with the centre of the Dar Mark on his left arm. There was a stinging pain and the man withdrew his wand and shoved Severus onwards.

"Snape, for cell 3261. Tracker implanted," the man intoned and shoved Severus through a door into the arms of four guards.

Without a second glance they dragged him along corridors and up staircases to almost the top of the pillar of misery that stood in the centre of the raging North Sea. Severus had easily lost track of where he was in the building when they stopped outside of a cell and flung the man inside. Once the door had been slammed shut three of the guards stomped off but one remained.

"Welcome to your hotel room, escape exits are nowhere and the free buffet is closed until further notice. Meals are whenever we can be bothered to feed you scum, you will be receiving no visitors or mail so there is no chance of your sorry hide escaping. But just to make sure we won't be deprived of your charming company sooner than anticipated, a tracker has been placed in your arm. Leaving your cell without the correct accompanying counter tracker will cause severe pain, and if you even attempt to leave this building without it being deactivated you will die an extremely slow and agonising death. I'll leave you to settle in and get acquainted with your scum neighbours who I'm sure will love to hear your plans to get out of jail. Isn't your plea that you were a spy? I bet these guys will love to thank you for betraying them," the guard spat at Severus' body still lying on the floor and left.

'_At least they got rid of the Dementors,'_ Severus thought with joy, before the whispers started.

"Did he say _Snape_? But you are dead, the Dark Lord confirmed it during the last duel?" a voice shouted from the furthest cell along the corridor.

"Snape? Is it true that you were a traitor? If I ever get my hands on you, you are going to wish that the Dark Lord himself had killed you in one of his easy torture sessions," one rough voice called along the corridor.

"Not if the guards get him first, they don't exactly like turncoats either," another voice replied.

"I bet they poison his food, or are going to sneak in when he is sleeping and rip his throat out. After making sure there isn't a patch of skin covered in blood," a third snickered.

'_This is going to be a long holiday,'_ Snape curled up on his thin mattress and tried to stay warm.

**~O~**

Without a watch, his wand or even sight of the sun through the thick clouds even guess the passage of time Severus was unable to guess how long he had been in his cell. However, it was certainly less than half a day before something happened outside in the corridor. He had spent the time inspecting his cell thoroughly before slumping on the pathetic excuse for a bed and sunk into his thoughts, only to be disturbed from his train of thought by the noise. A group of people had been walking up the corridor before the sounds of scuffling interrupted the regular tramp of feet. Suddenly something slammed against Severus' door.

"Snape, I know you're in there! You traitorous bastard, if I ever see your face again I swear I'll make sure you suffer! Wand or no, you will pay for taking the coward's way out!" the insane voice shrieked through the metal barrier.

"Ah, shut it Rowle. You're slaughtering days are over, no matter how much we don't care if you get rid of any other of these scum for us," one of the guards must have gagged Thorfinn somehow as there was no retort to the statement.

The sounds of scuffling and muffled curses continued down the corridor until a slamming door announced the fact that Rowle was safely back in his cell. Severus huffed in annoyance and shuffled on his bed to attempt to get comfy again.

"What, no smart retort to that, coward?" the voices started up again, much to Snape's chagrin.

"He's not replying because he knows it's true, as soon as he sets foot outside of these walls he's either going to be faced with a Dementor or someone with a wand ready to blow his brains out of his skull. Although both ways are too quick for worthless scum like him," a second replied.

"Then what does that make us?" a third asked.

"We are just scum, but at least we had morals and a code. He sold out his own side so that he could avoid this place and it failed. So he is worth less than us," the second answered smugly.

"Yeah, I see now, we don't want him to think he is as good as us," the third, obviously less educated person, said with misplaced pride.

'_Gods I would rather pierce my own eardrums than listen to these guys,'_ Severus gave up on trying to sleep and started mentally reciting potions recipes to block out the negative whisperings.

**~O~**

Severus was almost ready to smile when the sound of a key in the lock to his cell broke the silence. The other Death Eaters locked up further down the corridor had gotten bored after a few hours of trying to elicit a response from Snape and everyone had lapsed back into their separate worlds within their cells. Severus was prepared for a cold reception when the person entered his cell, who would want to waste time and warm words on someone like him? However he wasn't right in his estimations.

As his door opened outwards Snape had sat up to better regard the new face, but his action was cut short as he was flung against the back wall.

"Tut tut, were you seriously considering attacking me? Not a smart move," the huge man said in a condescending tone.

Severus glared in anger and pain from his spot where he had been stuck to the back wall of his cell. The spell had not been executed with any degree of care and his head had cracked against the wall with some considerable force. It seemed that any movement whilst a guard was entering a cell would be taken as an attempt to escape and would be treated as such, so Severus waited patiently for the guard to finish gloating and leave his food. What passed as food in Azkaban seemed to be a watery soup with a couple of lumps of unidentifiable vegetable and meat swimming in the liquid. Next to the bowl was a lump of what may have been considered bread a week ago. Severus assumed that water was only going to be available from the sink next to his toilet.

Once the meal was deposited the guard casually flicked his wand again and sent Severus tumbling to the floor as the spell was violently cancelled.

"Bon appétit," the guard spat as the door slammed shut again.

'_I hate this place,'_ Snape thought grimly as he shuffled over to where his food had been left. _'Minerva better hurry up with that appeal.'_

**A/N: I'm not that happy with this chapter, but I wasn't really sure how far I could go into Azkaban life without getting bogged down in description and endless repetition. I think we can all assume that life in there truly sucks considering that living conditions would be barely humane and there would be nothing to do. And being locked up with a tonne of homicidal maniacs wouldn't be that fun either. I am willing to attempt a re-write if people want me to… so let me know if you do!**


	6. Chapter 6, Wizengamot

6 – The Wizengamot

**A/N: My sincerest apologies for the late update, I was on holiday visiting my Aunt up north and so had no access to internet or my story. However, did get to watch Kingfishers hunting and got to see an elusive Bittern (yes, that is a bird)! To make up for breaking my uploading rule and my commitment to you, my very appreciated readers, I shall upload two chapters as well as the usual Friday update next week. Many thanks still for reading my work!**

Three weeks later the day finally arrived when Severus' hearing was scheduled, and the wizarding news had talked of little else for the last few days, it helped that July was always a slow month for the media. So much hatred and mystery swirled around this individual that everyone was talking about the trial and why such a blatant supporter of Voldemort was even being given the time? What was more interesting about this case was that the trial was being opened up so that the public viewing gallery was bigger than the courtroom itself, meaning even more people would be able to revel in the sentencing of one of the most infamous Death Eaters of the war. Of course, everyone was certain that the man would be sentenced to a lifetime in Azkaban, as the Kiss was too quick an end to such a vile creature.

McGonagall sat with her group of supporters in the area designated for those giving evidence, nervously twitching her hands waiting for Severus to arrive. The viewing gallery had been full for the last two hours, and she had only been there half an hour to watch the seething mass of humanity converse and condemn the man they knew nothing about. A door to the side of the room suddenly opened and the entirety of the Wizengamot filed into the room and sat down. Amelia Bones had been elected as Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot for services rendered during the war, and was in charge of proceedings due to Minister Shacklebolt's conflicts of interests with the case. The angry chatter subsided into silent expectation and all eyes started to dark between Bones, the chair in the centre of the room where the chair draped in chains waited, and the door where the final person was expected to enter from.

"Bring in the accused," Bones had obviously decided to get the trial over as quickly as possible.

The door was flung open and two men dragged in the sorry looking prisoner, who was in such a state that Minerva gasped. Severus himself offered no resistance to the two men escorting him, but their need for force was simply due to their prisoner being incapable of keeping up with their brisk pace. It was obvious that despite Severus had been allowed to tidy up his appearance he had been severely mistreated during his incarceration at Azkaban. Instead of the Azkaban uniform he was dressed in his usual black boots, trousers and white shirt but the rest of his customary outfit was gone, leaving him looking oddly vulnerable without his billowing black robes and jacket. The bandages covering his throat were gone and revealed the ugly scars that marred his throat, the lacing of his shirt having been removed to ensure he could not harm himself and therefore in the process making it impossible to hide his wounds. Minerva noticed that the scars looked inflamed and would be a cause for concern for Madam Pomfrey once she was made aware of them. Severus himself looked paler than usual and the dark bags under his eyes contrasted starkly with the rest of his face, and his hair hunk lank to hide his face as his head slumped forward.

'_When did he last eat, or sleep?'_ McGonagall thought with worry.

However it seemed that the majority of the room did not share her concerns as the audience growled angrily and the members of Wizengamot looked on impassively. Severus was dragged to the chair and unceremoniously dumped into it, the chains wasting no time in twining securely around his arms, legs and chest. Bones allowed the people gathered a few moments to assess the prisoner before banging the gavel and calling the room to order.

"The Wizengamot has assembled to hear the case of Severus Snape and his status as Death Eater. Ordinarily such a hearing would be just a formality and summarily dealt with, but evidence has been presented that Mr Snape was acting against Voldemort for Albus Dumbledore. In light of sources of this evidence, it was decided this trial was held," Bones tried to look unbiased but the distain in her voice made her opinion obvious. "Severus Snape, do you plead guilty to the charges of committing heinous acts as a Death Eater?"

The entire court waited with bated breath for the prisoner to answer. But no word emerged from Severus' mouth as he raised his head to stare at the Wizengamot.

"Come come man, at least have the decency to answer us, I'm sure that your master at least taught you etiquette as you listened to his mad rambling," A member of the court said loudly from the back of the assembled red-robed men.

Severus just glared at the man and kept his lips clammed shut.

"If you refuse to answer then we shall just send you back to Azkaban without this farce of a trial," the man continued.

The man bound in chains made an obvious attempt to clear his throat before trying to speak, but all that emerged was a rasped croak that was followed by a pained look crossing his features.

"Esteemed members of the court, may I speak?" Minerva decided to put an end to this torture and stood.

"I believe you just did," an old and fat man said from his position next to his equally snarky friend who spoke earlier.

"The Wizengamot recognises Minerva McGonagall, Headmistress of Hogwarts," Bones stated with impatience.

"I apologise for my interruption, but I feel that it is unfair to expect Severus to reply when he is incapable of doing so," Minerva started.

"Why is that so?" a female near the front of the assembled court asked.

"During the Battle of Hogwarts, Severus was attacked by Voldemort's snake, Nagini, and suffered horrific injuries to his throat. These injuries have made talking impossible for Severus as his vocal chords, as well as his arteries and trachea were shredded in the attack," the Headmistress explained.

"I thought those scars were just part of his natural charms and good looks," a third equally unattractive man quipped.

Minerva glared at the trio of unhelpful men as the assembled audience tittered, and she noticed Severus's hand twitch. Quickly she transferred her attention to the tired eyes that looked up at her and cooled her expression to one of concern as she looked down. Severus' eyes glinted with a hint of anger and irritation but were mostly clouded with fatigue. However he shifted his restrained hand again to try to convey a thought.

"If it is possible, I would ask the court that I could provide the necessary equipment for Severus to communicate with you, or for him to cast the necessary spell for him to speak through another means," Minerva said confidently.

She was still looking at Severus when the implication of that statement sunk in and saw the look of alarm cross his features. This feeling swept across the court and elicited uncertain murmurings.

"Headmistress McGonagall, please be clear for the records. Are you willing to subject yourself to the Imperius curse just to assist a Death Eater to clear his name?" Amelia Bones said disbelievingly.

"Your conviction that he could cast such as spell for a prolonged period of time successfully is testament in itself of his prowess at such Dark Magic," another voice emerged from the assembled members of the Wizengamot jury.

"Knowledge of the spell and confidence in your conviction is enough to perform such a spell, I could probably do such a curse myself without difficulty," Minerva sniffed in derision.

"This will get us nowhere, Severus Snape how do you plead. Guilty?" Amelia Bones cut through the angry swell of chatter with an easily answered question.

Severus instantly shook his head, to the delight of the crowd who wanted to see this evidence.

"Very well, we shall now hear from those who have stepped forward to testify for your innocence. As you are already standing, we shall start with you Headmistress," Bones said without concern.

Severus allowed his head to sink back to his chest and listened to the proceedings. The position was uncomfortable on his throat, but less tiring for the rest of his muscles that were needed in just keeping his head up. He had barely slept in the last three weeks, keeping his guard up so that Death Eaters and guards alike didn't have a chance to catch him unawares and exact revenge at the cost of his health. The food was terrible and the rooms were not much more than stone boxes with a bed, so constantly forcing himself to remain awake had cost too much energy and he was in a bad state. Severus knew that he had enough energy to make it through the hearing, but if things went ill then he would most likely not survive that long back in Azkaban.

'_Even if I emerge being deemed innocent of charges, I'm not entirely sure how I'm going to walk out of here,'_ Severus thought with worry.

Minerva spent at least half an hour giving evidence about Severus' life as a Spy, from his advanced warnings of Death Eater movements that had saved lives, to his attempts to divert those in detention from the Carrow's and their barbaric punishments to less detrimental detentions. She also vaguely mentioned Snape's attempts to assist Harry Potter in his mission to stop Voldemort, and his actions in stopping Quirrell from throwing Harry from his broom in his very first Quidditch game.

Once she had finished a string of lesser people who stood to give evidence of Severus' innocence, with none of them providing as much substantial evidence as they had not been in such fortunate positions to witness impressive enough feats to sway the judges. Severus was quietly seething as his memories that he had given Harry had 'mysteriously' disappeared whilst being held as evidence, providing that source moot and void of being useful.

'_Think Severus! There must be a way of getting my voice across!'_ Snape sat and zoned out of the discussion raging about him and concentrated on a glimmer of an idea he had.

Minerva sat and watched the proceedings with a growing sense of despair, the 'loss' of Severus' memories had proved a significant blow to their argument, and with Remus lying still unconscious in the Hospital Wing under the eye of Madam Pomfrey, they had few members of the Order left to provide sufficiently varied evidence to be of use. Dedalus Diggle had just finished giving his evidence and had sat down, and the Wizengamot were starting to get bored with the barely interesting evidence.

"Have you any more pathetic sources of evidence waiting to speak?" a member of the jury spoke up with contempt.

"Just one more," a stern voice rang out from the doorway as Madam Pomfrey strode into the room.

"I thought you were looking after Remus?" Minerva whispered to her under the cover of the remarks made by the rest of the room.

"Molly Weasley took over for me," Poppy said with a smile before she moved forward.

"And what can you bring to the stack of 'amazingly convincing' evidence?" the first snide voice spoke up once more.

"The medical records of Severus Snape, which should not only provide an insight as to why Severus was lured to Voldemort, and how much he paid to be a spy for us," Poppy said with confidence, which certainly got the attention of the room.

"Please continue," Amelia Bones said with a glare to the group of hecklers on the back row behind her.

Poppy then began by outlining the regular trips that Severus endured to the Hospital Wing due to the harsh actions of the Marauders and his own father which led to him searching for means to become more powerful and gain more respect. Although his studies led to him becoming the youngest Potions Master in two centuries, the immediate promise of power given by Voldemort drew the young Severus in. Before he had a chance to change his mind, he had been branded by the Dark Mark and was regretting his decision. Within six months she had turned spy for Dumbledore, and although Voldemort suspected him he never broke under regular torture and beatings. The medical scans Poppy brought with her highlighted the many wounds she had detected as she had fought to save his life from Nagini's bites.

"Did you never consider that these wounds were planted by the Dark Lord to make his plight direr and get you to pity him?" a rational voice asked calmly.

'_**If you had listened, I think you would have heard Poppy state that she had never realised these wounds had occurred until I was unconscious and could not stop them from seeing my shame,'**_ the voice that whispered through the courtroom made many people shriek in fear.

"Severus, what are you doing?" Minerva said cautiously, recognising the method of communication from Voldemort's broadcasts during the Battle.

'_**Sorry Minerva, but I decided that I was getting bored of not being able to speak in my own defence,' **_Everyone could see Snape's face bent in concentration with a ghost of a smirk on his face.

"How are you doing this?" Amelia Bones said with concern.

'_**I devised this spell before the Battle for Voldemort so that he could address those in the castle without having to try to stop the fighting bodily, however it requires a lot more concentration and power to broadcast thought alone rather than simply voice as I have to make sure I do not accidentally broadcast unrelated thoughts. I do not have much time so I am going to show you my defence whilst I can and then you can argue your verdict. If I pass out I apologise, but as you can see I am not in the best shape to be conducting such a difficult spell,'**_ Snape gave them a moment to absorb the information.

Those present were then bombarded with a torrent of memories and emotions, poured forth in such a torrent that echoed Snape's desperation to prove his innocence before he passed out.

_The memories started off by echoing Poppy's evidence, showing a select few humiliating encounters between Severus and the Marauders that left him crying in frustration and vowing revenge, to progressing to him receiving the Dark Mark and his utter revulsion to his new Master once he was expected to join in killing muggles. In a stark moment of honesty, Severus relived every single time he had killed innocents, and the subsequent days of revulsion at himself that was as extreme as self harm in punishment and more vows to help bring the Dark Lord to an end. Then the dark day when he found Lily dead on the floor, and his utter despair at that memory made a few people sniff in sympathy. A few memories followed of trying to protect Harry Potter at Hogwarts, then the rise of the Dark Lord._

Minerva was horrified by what she saw in the next few memories, but was able to distance herself enough to watch the faces of others around the room. There were more than a few men and almost every woman looked as white as Severus as they were forced to watch the darker set of memories that followed. She quickly looked to Severus and noted sweat was pouring from his face that was now scrunched in concentration, and looking like he could not hold out for much longer. Minerva sent a silent prayer that he could hold out before turning her concentration to the memories.

_They all experienced the agonising burn of the Dark Mark on his arm, followed by the way of revulsion and fear as he realised that Voldemort was back; then the first meeting with the vile creature once he had been ordered to return to being a spy by Dumbledore. The memories became more distressing and painful to watch as Voldemort's insanity was reflected in his treatment of his followers, which mostly consisted of at least one member being flogged at each meeting for some imagined slight. Severus seemed to be on the receiving end of more than half of those beatings due to a lack of substantial reports on Dumbledore's plans. The particularly horrendous beating that led to Severus being unconscious in the Forbidden Forest for two days, and the one where he had almost cracked and begged for death drew gasps of horror from many of the audience. _

Minerva herself felt her heart break as she watched how he always patched himself up and overdosed on painkilling potions so that he would always seem normal at the Order meetings, and how he constantly blamed himself when an attack occurred and people were slaughtered, and because he had not heard about them no one could stop them. The feeling of guilt almost made her choke as she saw how he was forced to see their beloved Hogwarts mutated into a perverse institute of Dark Magic, at seeing how the Carrow's revelled in the punishment of the innocent children under _his_ care.

_The memories continued as everyone was subjected to witness his promise to Dumbledore, then Snape's utter revulsion and yet determination as he fulfilled the promise and blasted the previous Headmaster from the Astronomy Tower roof. His guilt at that act was obvious, as they saw he punished himself severely for that act of ultimate obedience. A few memories of his short stint as Headmaster of Hogwarts followed, him taking counsel from Portrait-Dumbledore, and diverting the Carrows away from DA meetings. And finally he made them all flinch at reliving Nagini's attack, his desperate final act to pass on the last pieces of information to destroy Voldemort, and his terror that he had failed and the Dark Lord would triumph._

The flow of memories flickered and died, releasing everyone's concentration back to the courtroom where the prisoner had completely slumped in his chair. The chains that had been installed with the intention of restraining unruly prisoners were now the only thing holding the unconscious man upright.

For a second nobody moved, before Poppy dashed forward and inspected him.

"He's stopped breathing," she announced before drawing her wand. "_Enervate!_ Come on, I didn't fight to save your life only for you to give it up now!"

After a tense couple of minutes the court was rewarded by Snape jolting back to consciousness with a loud gasp.

"There we go, sorry about that but I refuse to let you off that easy," Poppy gently coaxed a fortifying potion into him before allowing the court to continue.

"Well, in light of the amount of evidence given by Severus Snape, the court shall adjourn for five minutes for the Wizengamot to consider the evidence before passing judgement. Headmistress and Madam Pomfrey, you may speak to Mr Snape but may not touch the bindings," Amelia Bones said faintly before sweeping from the room, looking decidedly ill.

"Did you really have to go into so much detail with a few of those memories? I swear I heard someone in the viewing gallery be sick," Minerva chided Snape gently as she conjured a handkerchief to mop his fevered brow.

Severus at least had the decency to look slightly apologetic, but he then pulled a defiant face and glared to where the Wizengamot had been sitting.

"We know you weren't going down without a fight, but you aren't in a good enough state to be risking such a strenuous spell. I'm not letting you out of the Hospital Wing for at least three days once we get back to Hogwarts," Poppy stated with a tone that brokered no arguments.

"It seems to have worked though, you should see the faces of the people in the viewing gallery," Minerva said quietly with a hint of triumph in her voice. "The problem with them making this hearing public is that if they sentence you to Azkaban now they have too many witnesses to your memories that might be sympathetic to you now."

Severus did quickly crane his neck around to get a look at the viewing gallery, and did indeed see the majority of the people looking down at him wearing pale expressions of compassion. There were still a couple of people who had mutinous looks upon their faces, and who muttered darkly to each other, but if the Wizengamot votes were mirrored by the faces in the spectators, Severus should just have enough support to walk free.

The five minutes passed quickly and the now composed members of the Wizengamot filed back into their seats to pass judgement. Severus quickly composed himself as much as he could in the condition he was in, whilst Minerva and Poppy trotted back to their seats.

"The Wizengamot shall now pass judgement on Severus Snape. Those who believe that although he did serve as a Death Eater but under duress as a Spy and follower of Dumbledore, raise their wands," Amelia Bones ordered, before raising her own.

After a few moments hesitation, forty two of the fifty Wizengamot members raised their wands in favour of declaring Severus innocent.

"Severus Snape is hereby pronounced innocent of his actions under the guise of Death Eater. Your determination to assist the side of good is admirable considering the amount of suffering you endured to gain any knowledge. I hope you recover soon enough to take up your position at Hogwarts before term starts," Amelia Bones smiled gently at the man, and court was dismissed at the sound of the gavel.

'_**Thank you,'**_ Severus' voice echoed around the room for the final time, causing a few people to stiffen in fear. Bones, on the other hand, smiled even more and inclined her head in his direction before leaving the room.

"I brought you some things so from your rooms, I hope you don't mind my intrusion. It was fortuitous really as I really didn't expect them to keep your clothes in good condition," Minerva stepped forward to Severus as the chains released the man.

Severus attempted to struggle to his feet, but immediately fell backwards as his legs gave out from underneath him.

"Seems like you really did use more energy that was wise with that little stunt of yours," Poppy said with exasperation before the two women helped Severus to his feet.

Minerva quickly pulled out some shrunken clothing from her pocket and grew them to their proper size before giving them to Severus to wear. The look of gratitude was startling as he fumbled to throw his robe on quickly to hide the worst of the damage done to his body in the last three weeks. However his usually rock steady hands were shaking so violently Minerva gently brushed his hands aside and did the buttons on his chest and arms up for him. His robe looked even more voluminous on him now that he had lost so much weight he was only skin and bone, but once he had donned it the worst signs of his state of health were hidden and made Severus look at least halfway back to his normal intimidating self. At least he would if he wasn't using Minerva's shoulder as a source of stability to enable him to stand upright and that his face was not his customary healthy pale shade but more of a deathly white.

"I would imagine there is going to be a sea of people out there waiting to question you, or accost you. If you'd like you can come this way and recuperate a bit before braving the masses," a quiet voice offered from behind them.

Poppy span round to see Amelia Bones gently leaning on the doorframe that the Wizengamot had exited through, whilst Minerva had to crane her neck to see the woman as Severus hadn't moved.

"That is very generous of you," Minerva said with a guarded expression.

"It is the least that we could do for Severus. I admit that I was a little sceptical of your defence of him, but considering the evidence there is no doubt in my mind that we sorely misjudged you. The problem is you are too good an actor," Amelia smiled at the man, who simply inclined his head in acknowledgement.

"I don't see how we are going to get you out of here in this state, you can barely stand let alone walk," Poppy fussed worriedly over her patient.

"I have some potions and food through here, and if that is not enough then there is always the option of sneaking away through our fire here," Amelia led the way into a spacious yet cosy antechamber filled with comfy chairs.

She directed the trio over to the seats nearest the fire and grabbed a tray of various potions for Poppy to peruse through. Next she summoned a plate of sandwiches and cakes and made Severus take a few. Severus hadn't eaten much in the last three weeks, and certainly whatever he had been given as 'food' was nowhere as appetising as that presented to him now, so he quite happily set to eating. Unfortunately he wasn't used to much food nor to it being so rich like these sophisticated sandwiches were, so he only managed three quarters of a sandwich.

"You should eat more," Amelia urged as he put the fourth triangle of sandwich down with only a bite taken out of it.

Severus simply glanced at her and pulled a face in defence.

"I doubt he is used to eating much so that is probably enough for now, once we get back to the castle the House Elves will be instructed to keep badgering him with food," Minerva interjected quickly. Then as she noted the scowl aimed at her she added "you know I'm not going to let you waste away in your quarters."

"Take these potions; they should be enough to get you to the Floo point. Although it is tempting to just use the fire here it would be better for you to be seen walking out of here a free man," Madam Pomfrey handed him four potions.

Severus was still looking rather withdrawn and haunted, but drank the potions without complaint or comment. Pomfrey knew that two of the potions tasted vile enough to at least elicit a small wince, so the lack of reaction concerned her. She threw a glance to the other two women to alert them to her concerns, and Amelia immediately reacted and walked over to the fire. A few minutes later Kingsley Shacklebolt walked through the fire and into their group.

"Come, Severus, let's get you home," he gently pulled the man to his feet and guided him to the door.

"Shacklebolt?" Minerva said in question to Amelia.

"He has the force needed to get you through the crowd quickly, and he was willing to help as he felt guilty because he could not testify during the hearing. I'm sure Severus wouldn't have needed to exert himself with that spell if Kingsley had been able to speak, the respect that the Wizengamot has for him would have been enough to clear Severus almost immediately," Bones explained.

'**Wait, there was a person in administration I think you should promote… Jenkins… Leah. Do not waste her talents there any longer,' **Severus contacted the quickly.

"You aren't going to make it further than the door if you keep doing that," Poppy said forcefully, despite being impressed that Severus was thinking of someone else in his discomfort.

Once they retraced their steps and were at the door to the courtroom, Kingsley let go of Severus' arm and checked he was well enough to continue. Shacklebolt positioned himself at the front of the group, with Severus slightly behind him, and Minerva and Poppy bringing up the rear. Amelia wished the group good luck before retreating; being seen with the group could harm her ruling and send Severus back to Azkaban. Minister Shacklebolt pushed the door open and was greeted by a veritable tsunami of shouts uttered by an equally unsettling seething mass of people. They all pushed forward, eager to see the newly acquitted Death Eater, but whether their intentions were good or ill it was hard to tell.

Minerva could see the usually fearless Potions Master start to cringe at the scene and was glad when Shacklebolt ordered them to make way for the group, which the people did with some effort and a lot of grumbling. By the time they had managed to get through the crowd they had had thousands of questions shouted at them by reporters and not one of the four could see properly from the sheer number of photographs that had been taken. Thankfully Shacklebolt's anger had dissuaded even the most persistent reporter from following them as they hurried as quickly as Severus could manage through the endless corridors to the lift that could take them to the entrance hall.

Entering the lift was surprisingly not too much of an ordeal, as Arthur Weasley and two of his colleagues from the newly formed Muggle Relations department were both riding in the lift and were able to ensure that the other two Ministry workers in the lift kept their silence at having to share a ride with an ex-Death Eater. The stares and whispers started again as they reached the entrance hall, but they were manageable. Severus was partially aware that the unjust fountain statue of the oppressed Muggles was being demolished with the intent of having another statue similar to the previous one that Dumbledore and Voldemort had destroyed a year or so ago. The group marched towards the fireplaces and with Shacklebolt's glare they were able to skip queuing and had immediate access.

"I hope you are well again soon, Severus. Minerva, I shall see you soon; and Poppy, good luck keeping him resting," Shacklebolt nodded to them and swept back into the maze that made up the Ministry.

Minerva went first, and Poppy called out the destination for Severus so that all he had to do was step through the fires. They appeared in Madam Pomfrey's office in the Hospital Wing, which was usually not connected for such transportation. However in this case McGonagall had set it up and both females were extremely grateful for her foresight. Severus seemed to be oblivious to his surroundings and didn't even mutter a single protest as Poppy gently took off his robe and guided him back to the bed he had occupied just over three weeks ago. Once he reached the bed he simply sat on it before slumping sideways so that his head was on the pillow before passing out, leaving Poppy to swing his legs up onto the bed. She quickly removed his shoes and transfigured his clothes into black cotton pyjamas before pulling the covers over him and leaving him to sleep.


	7. Chapter 7, Best Laid Plans

7 – Best Laid Plans 4,600

It was a week later that Severus finally awoke to find himself still feeling the lovely warmth permeate his body as his dream lingered on even after he returned to consciousness. He had had a few of these dreams whilst in his cell and he clung to the absence of cold in his bones desperately in the hope that he could go back to sleep and deny reality for a bit longer. He was quite sure that his dream had been rather bizarre as it included the Ministry and Hogwarts, but he wasn't picky about what he dreamt about as long as it wasn't Azkaban. Even dreaming about the tedious hours he had spent supervising detentions was preferable to staring at the damp grey walls of his cell for hours at a time.

After a few minutes of trying to get back to sleep he became aware that the warm feeling hadn't disappeared like it usually did after he returned to consciousness in his cell. He sighed in frustration at this distraction that had made him awaken further and decided it would not hurt to crack an eyelid open and acknowledge his cell before trying to get back to sleep. However the sight that met his eye jerked him fully back to awareness as the pale walls and ceiling almost hurt his retinas. Severus opened both eyes to make sure he really was seeing the Hospital Wing roof before scanning the rest of the room he could see from his prone position before almost smiling in relief. Deciding that this was real, Snape gingerly sat up and was surprised that despite feeling incredibly weak he was not in any pain, and even his neck seemed to not be in too bad condition.

'_Wasn't Lupin here as well last time?'_ Severus thought and tried to put his thoughts back into a reasonable order.

His actions were unnecessary as the man in question appeared at that moment from the bathroom and shuffled his way back to his bed opposite Severus.

"So you're awake," Lupin's flat and expressionless voice shocked Snape.

'_He's usually got at least a small amount of fire and courtesy in him, what's wrong?'_ Snape thought, before it snapped into place. Tonks was dead, and the now cognizant Remus must know.

Snape tried to speak but again all that emerged was a rasping sound. He glowered in anger at that and simply settled for nodding.

Without the means to communicate (transfiguration was not something Severus ever managed to do without a wand) Remus simply returned to his bed and curled into a ball facing the wall. Snape sighed and was going to attempt to summon Lottie for some food when Poppy bustled out of her office. Severus was infinitely glad for this as he doubted he could deal with a joyous and distraught House Elf at the moment. Madam Pomfrey immediately started casting diagnostic charms over him to check his temperature and recovery before she properly regarded her patient.

"I'm glad to see that you've finally woken up, after your stunt at the Ministry we were worried that you had done some irreparable damage to your magical core through overexertion. Don't worry, we checked and you were at least conservative enough to not have pushed yourself that far," Poppy said quickly at the look Severus gave her.

She must have summoned food before she started her examination of Snape, as a House Elf appeared at that moment with a large tray of food. Nodding his thanks to both human and elf, he quickly tucked into the chicken soup with bread and a pitcher of orange juice. A bowl of fruit was levitated from the tray to Severus' nightstand for later consumption.

"Minerva will be glad to hear you are conscious again, but she has already given me a message to pass on," Poppy ensured she had her patient's full attention before she continued. "She said that you are not allowed to leave the Hospital Wing until I give the order, as your Headmistress and employer she hopes that you will agree with her judgement."

Severus scowled slightly at the ruling, but Poppy glared at him and the man backed down.

"I know you think otherwise but you really did give Minerva a scare and she is determined to make sure you are properly cared for after the abysmal conditions you had to put up with for those three weeks. If it makes you feel any better, I've been regularly giving you nutrition potions and others to ensure your body started to recuperate even whilst you slept. You should be able to leave after a few days, as long as you swear to look after yourself once you are out of my care. After seeing your memories Minerva is quite determined to ensure you don't simply lock yourself away and neglect to keep on my good work of saving your life twice," Poppy said gently but with a hint of danger intertwining said gentility.

_**So you're going to claim a life debt,**_ Severus wrote angrily on the pad by his bed.

"Oh stop being such a bloody Slytherin! Not everyone acts simply for their own benefit, you should know by now that I took a Healer's Oath and I would not be able to sleep soundly with my conscience if I had let you die," Poppy snapped with uncharacteristic anger, making Severus flinch.

"Sorry, you know I care about you, so stop wallowing and live a little," Poppy tried again more gently so as to not intimidate the still fragile man.

Severus meekly nodded his head and leant back onto his now raised pillows and looked gratefully at the mediwitch as she summoned another blanket to put on top of his duvet.

"Good, I'm glad that you are starting to be less stubborn and open to sensible ideas. I've got some books that Minerva thought you might like to read, as well as some post. Don't worry, the majority of the Howlers have been directed at the headmistress, and she has taken care of the ones that were sent to you too," Poppy vanished the food tray, piled said books and letters onto Severus' table and retreated to check on Remus.

Severus turned to the pile of letters but couldn't bring himself to look at them, instead he quickly leafed through the many copies of the Daily Prophet that had accumulated since he had left. The seventh one in the pile happened to be the issue on the day after his release, and a photograph of him covered a large section of the front page.

'_Azkaban is truly a horrid place to be cooped up in for three weeks, I'm surprised they didn't recoil and try to kill me if I looked like that,'_ Snape thought humourlessly. But looking closer at his moving photo on the front page, Severus could see that the man was indeed severely ill but still had an air of dignity and power that would cause a simple wizard to think twice about dismissing him.

'_Could be worse, Black looked horrific after his sojourn there,'_ Severus discarded the newspapers and decided to take a nap in the hopes it would speed up the healing process.

**~O~**

Severus was pulled out of his dreamless sleep by the sounds of muffled crying that echoed around the room despite the source's obvious attempts to stifle the sound. After a few minutes the crying continued and Severus was confused as to why Poppy hadn't appeared to comfort Lupin, who was obviously in mourning and potentially verging on depression. After wrestling with his conscious for a few moments longer, Severus dragged himself out of bed and made his way unsteadily to Lupin's cornered off bed. The sound of the curtains being drawn back caused the muffled sounds to cease and the bed's occupant to pretend he was sleeping.

'_How the heck am I going to talk to him, it's too dark to see any writing,'_ Severus thought about it as he moved to sit on the chair next to the bed.

The figure entangled in the sheets remained motionless, and Severus eventually gave up trying to figure out to communicate and decided to forgo his usual rule of no human contact. Although it pained him to do it, he simply put a reassuring hand on the man's shoulder. If it was possible the body under the covers tensed even further at the touch. After a long enough period of time passed and it became obvious the hand on the shoulder would not budge, Lupin finally uncovered his head to look confusedly at his unlikely comforter.

The werewolf looked even more tired and haggard than Severus remembered ever seeing him, and that fact alone sent warning bells ringing in his brain.

'_He didn't look half this bad during the day; he must be casting some glamour charms to stop Poppy from suspecting. And if he is doing that then there must be a silencing charm over her office so she wouldn't here his nightly grief,'_ Severus quickly surmised.

"Sorry Severus, I'm just a bit overtired today and I let it get to me. You should get back to bed," Lupin said with as much gusto as he could manage.

Snape snorted at this and raised an eyebrow, a sure sign that Remus could see his disbelief at this blatant lie. He quickly rummaged through the drawer of the sidetable and withdrew a packet of tissues and gently but firmly pressed them into Lupin's hands. Although he had moved his hand as soon as Remus moved, Severus pulled his chair closer to the bed as a sign that he wasn't going anywhere and waited for Lupin to tidy himself up.

"You don't need to deal with this, go back to bed," Lupin almost pleaded to the stern man sitting next to him and tried to bury himself in the bed again.

'_If it wasn't for the fact I suspect you are nearing the suicidal stage of depression I would leave you to it. As it is get your head out from under those covers!'_ Snape snarled in his head and tugged the covers back.

"I know you don't care, so just go back to bed," Remus sighed and rolled over.

'_That's it!'_ Severus huffed and marched back to his bed. To Remus it seemed that he had given up but the potions master was soon back at his bedside, wand and notepad in hand.

Severus cast a quick blackout charm on the windows to Pomfrey's office before creating a couple of balls of light to hang above Remus' bed. With the improvement in visibility he would now be able to communicate with the disconsolate werewolf.

_**Remus stop this already! I've been where you are and if you don't snap out of this soon then you are heading for trouble! **_Severus scribbled on his pad and tried to force the man to read it.

However even with the increased lighting provided by Severus' silent casting and the not being shoved practically up his nose, Remus refused to acknowledge Snape and curled into an even tighter ball. Snape growled and cast a succession of spells. Within a minute Remus had been stunned, uncurled from his defensive ball and laid straight before being put into a full body-bind curse and reawakened.

Now that he had control of the situation again, Severus quickly evaluated his options of how to continue before staring straight into the enraged eyes of the werewolf. In a heartbeat he was gently knocking on the edges of the man's mental shieldings, wanting to access his thoughts but unwilling to truly force his way through into the most intimate part of a person's soul.

"_I'm not leaving until you talk to me, you cannot keep shutting out the world and ignoring everyone. Sooner or later that is going to lead to a dark place that you won't return from," _Severus thought towards the resisting man. He continued to gently knock on the barriers and waited.

Remus' expression changed from simply anger to be mixed with irritation and what could have been fear. For a few minutes he seemed determined to stay stalwart in his resolve, so Severus again changed his plan. He ceased his knocking and offered up a memory of his own, something he had never done to another living person willingly. It was one of the dark period in his life just after Lily had been killed, a time of his life he rarely thought about. His work as a spy was over, he had no friends and Dumbledore was oblivious to the spiral of depression his young potions master was sinking in to. If it hadn't been for the House Elves that had practically stolen his alcohol and ensured that no sharp implements could be used to cut human skin Severus would have undoubtedly taken his own life.

The werewolf seemed reluctant to remove his shields enough to view the memory, but eventually he did and seemed to become less hostile to the silent man next to him.

"_I know what you are going through, I may not have been engaged to her but I loved Lily so much," _Severus thought through the void.

The act of honesty had the desired effect on the werewolf and he slowly lowered his mental shields. It did not take Severus long to see that the man was in a dangerous place, the most prominent thoughts in his mind were not of a nature that should be encouraged. Despite initially feeling reluctant to approach the man, Severus was wise enough to realise that he had been fortunate to witness the extremely troublesome grief this man was carrying.

Remus seemed to have fully given up on shielding himself from Severus, and hundreds of thoughts and feelings rushed passed the man. With the battle to get him to open up won, Severus removed the curse and Remus was free to move again. Snape then proceeded to do something that neither of them expected, nor could explain when they thought about it in the future. He dragged the man into a seated position, that elicited a very scared plea for him to stop, before giving Remus an almost bone crushing hug. The man emitted an odd gasped yelp as he was surprised by Snape's actions and felt pain from the accidental power Severus had used to grab the man and ensure he didn't wriggle away. The oddly comforting gesture broke all the final walls Lupin had created to guard himself from humanity and he wept bitterly.

"Sorry, I shouldn't be like this, but when they told me that Tonks had died in the same rubble pile that I got trapped in I started wishing I hadn't woken up," Lupin said miserably. "She was pregnant. I was terrified of passing on my curse but so excited to make a real family. She had pushed me into accepting her, then accepting our child… Now I don't have either of them."

'_Oh boy,'_ Severus thought as he just sat there and became the proverbial shoulder for Remus to cry on.

For the next half an hour he felt his pyjama top get completely saturated with tears as Lupin cried himself to sleep still clinging to the man who he had once counted as his enemy. Severus finally decided that it was safe to pry the man from himself when it was evident he was deep in sleep, before retreating to his own bed.

'_What exactly did I just do? If anyone hears about this then I'm going to be ridiculed for the rest of my life as the softest Death Eater to have existed,'_ Severus chuckled to himself tiredly as he imagined the Dark Lord giving counselling sessions to timid Death Eaters.

'_Lupin needs someone right now, if it has to be me then I will just have to be there for him. If he has to grieve alone then he will likely end up being a cold heartless bastard like me after mother died, or worse he could seriously do himself harm come the next full moon if he so wished. If wild he could tear himself to shreds, but with Wolsfbane he could be cunning enough to get close enough to civilisation to get himself blasted out of existence,'_ with that cheery thought Severus vowed to keep a silent but close eye on the other hospital occupant.

The next day neither man brought up the events of the previous night, but Pomfrey did mention that Lupin looked much more settled and content than before. Just as Severus was fearing that she would continue with that thought McGonagall strode into the Hospital Wing, and put pay to that potentially awkward conversation.

"I'm glad I've caught you both awake, I really do need to make a decision on professors for next year. Remus, you've heard my proposition about teaching here next year, will you accept it?" Minerva started briskly.

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to decline your offer, you know as well as I that I cannot adequately teach the students how to brew potions, I barely scraped an Exceeds Expectations when I had to study it," Remus said quietly.

Before Minerva had time to reply an enchanted note fluttered onto her wrist. Showing her approval at the elegant charms work, she smoothed the origami bird out flat to read the note.

"You want to go back to being Potions Master? Severus, why? I've already given you the Defence Against the Dark Arts position," McGonagall said with surprise.

_**I've had enough of working with the Dark Arts for a lifetime. My sojourn in Azkaban helped reinforce my decision that I cannot face what memories teaching defence may bring up. I'm much more content with the idea of going back to my potions lab.**_ Severus' handwriting showed his conviction in the decision.

"If you are sure, then perhaps you wouldn't mind taking the Defence position Remus? You did a sterling job of it four years ago," Minerva said with an encouraging smile.

"If the students accept being taught by a known werewolf, then I cannot see a way out of this," Remus said with a tight smile.

A scrunched up note sailed across the room and hit him on the forehead. _**I can teach the students about brewing Wolfsbane, it might help make it less of a rare commodity and also help promote tolerance to werewolves who use it. Although if we ever get any students who are capable enough to brew it I will be amazed… Perhaps I will just hold a seminar on it and brew it myself.**_

"That would be extremely useful," Minerva hid her shock at Severus' kind act, and Remus also found it hard to stifle his surprise after reading the note aloud.

_**If it means we have a half decent DADA teacher then I'm willing to sacrifice some time to keep him around. Just don't even consider finding someone like Lockhart to fill that post ever again!**_

_**Also, I wouldn't mind helping with a Duelling club if you set one up.**_

Minerva's face alternated between surprise and amusement at the new side to Severus that she was seeing, and silently prayed to any and every deity that existed that it would continue to show through. A still sarcastic but not cuttingly cruel or hostile Severus was actually reasonably pleasant company and made the man seem much more approachable than the intimidating figure previously.

She eventually dragged herself away from the odd three way conversation they had easily slipped into about the upcoming year as she had to owl a few prospective teachers that the positions had been filled. And there was the huge stack of paperwork waiting for her on her desk, and she had to check the new House Elves had settled in to castle life well enough, and ensure that all first year students had confirmed their attendance in September…

"I do not envy her position right now, it must be quite stressful and boring at times," Remus watched her go, before nervously casting a muffling charm on the medi-witch's office. "Thank you for not bringing up last night, I don't know what came over me."

Snape rolled his eyes at the Gryffindor habit of honesty and all that as he scribbled off another note.

_**Don't mention it, and stick around and I'll count that as thanks enough. Besides, you would have tried to force comfort on me if I was in distress. I wouldn't have accepted it but I only returned the same sentiment.**_

Remus read the note that had again made contact with his head and smiled indiscreetly at Severus' behaviour. He never would have imagined ever liking the man, but already felt a sort of friendship forming between them.

**~O~**

Severus was immensely grateful to finally be able to return to his rooms in the dungeons for the first time since leaving Azkaban three weeks earlier, Poppy had been especially thorough in ensuring he was completely healed and for once Severus was only half-hearted in his protests, as more time there meant longer to keep an eye on the werewolf. He pointed his wand at the fireplace and flames immediately began licking the logs cheerfully, and lit the room sufficiently that Severus could relax onto the sofa. Despite being in a safe building with wards protecting the boundaries _and_ his own rooms, he still found it difficult to relax in dark places on his own. Paranoia had definitely been a side-effect of a lifetime of spy activities, and that had been increased by his short stint in Azkaban.

Severus poured himself a large glass of the potent firewhiskey and necked it with practiced ease. Slowly he rotated so that he lay on his back with his knees on the arm of the sofa and kicked off his shoes to land on the floor, and gently undid the high collar of his shirt and tunic to ease the pressure on his still sore neck. Despite the constant rest, endless potions and a degree of patience previously unexhibited by the dark man, his voice had not returned. Poppy had checked every book she had on snake bites and venoms, and then even more on the physiology of the throat with no success. In desperation the mediwitch had even called in a thoracic expert from St Mungo's to examine Severus, despite the fact she knew he would, and did, hate the unknown person being forced intimately close to him to examine his neck. But by the end of the three weeks both of them had given up hope of finding a cure and Snape was resigned to the fact he was going to be mute for the rest of his life.

Aided by the hefty quantity of alcohol he had consumed as well as the cheerful fire and familer surroundings, the Potions Master found himself starting to drift off into a comfortable sleep. However a brilliant flash quickly interrupted the peace and caused the confused man to accidently send his glass flying into the fireplace where it shattered and cast odd reflections of firelight dancing across the ceiling. Luckily Severus had not tried to sit up, as the cause of the flash became evident as Fawkes sat heavily on his navel.

Severus was completely stunned the bird had reappeared, especially considering the last time he had been seen was the day Dumbledore died, and he had been the cause of that. Phoenix's were known for their ability to understand human speech, and Snape was desperate to ask the bird why it had come to him but was frustratingly unable to do so. As if sensing his frustration Fawkes started to slowly walk up his chest, his sharp talons digging through the material of Snape's clothing and making him wince as the bird deliberately moved. Once he reached the top of the human's chest he stopped and bent to pull Severus' collar apart further.

Severus remained absolutely still and stared at the ceiling, fearing that Phoenix's may possess a malicious streak that involved murdering the murderers of their previous human partners. Slowly he became aware of a warm, almost burning sensation that attacked his throat and seemed to sink through deep through the skin where it came close to reaching unbearably hot. After what felt like half an hour the pain started to recede and the phoenix regarded his work with a critical eye, before flashing out of existence again. In hopeful desperation Severus scrambled up from his couch, cursing the fact that his partially inebriated mind made it difficult for him to move gracefully and he tripped over his shoes once and his feet twice. But finally reached his destination and impatiently cast the most powerful lumos spell he could to better inspect his throat where the Phoenix tears had fallen.

'_Damn that dratted bird,'_ Severus turned from the mirror and had to compose himself after working himself up too much. His throat was still a ragged mess of scars and didn't even look remotely less hideous in his eyes, the bird had done nothing.

He dejectedly slumped onto his bed and carelessly dropped his wand onto the side table and gave in to sleep.

**~O~**

_He had failed in his job as a spy and had been found out. Voldemort had succeeded in killing Potter and was joyfully making Hagrid carry the still body along the bridge to the courtyard in front of castle whilst a group of werewolves pulled his own roped body along. The sight of all the defenders crying out in horror at Harry's body made the Death Eaters shout in triumph._

"_Considering your moment of defeat, I thought I would give you a conciliatory gift to make you feel at least a little better now that your world is at an end. We thought that you would like to know how we so easily managed to stop every little trick you invented," Voldemort started with his disgustingly gentle tones._

_The werewolves cut his ropes and shoved him forward into the no-man's-land between the two forces._

"_He's been telling us every single little plan that you concocted ever since the beginning of the first war. He told you he was a double agent, but in reality is just a liar who has outlived his uses," Voldemort's dismissive tones sent a spike of fear into Severus' gut._

_Out of the ranks of the defenders of Hogwarts a tall witch marched forward with the anger of one betrayed._

"_Minerva, please I can explain," Severus said quickly as the fury in her eyes grew._

"_You lied to us! You betrayed us to that bastard? You don't deserve the chance to explain!" Minerva shouted as she pointed her wand at him. "_CRUCIO MAXIMA!_"_

"NO!" Severus bolted upright, his face drenched in sweat as his pulse raced and he gasped for air. The dream hadn't been too bad in itself, it was the look of complete betrayal and hurt on Minerva's face that had him waking up screaming.

'_Hang on, screaming?'_ Snape thought as he calmed himself down.

And with that revelation he was soon sitting upright and laughing his head off in joy that he was finally on the way to recovery.


	8. Chapter 8, Healing

8 – Healing

**A/N: Forgot to say previously, thanks to Azenor Lestrange and two guests for joining the small team (could easily be labelled as minute as there are only 5 of you so far!) of people who have left reviews, it is much appreciated!  
One guest did point out that I almost created a plothole, sort of. When I mention Severus' throat being healed, I mean completely in the fact he can talk properly with his normal voice, not a broken rasp that would cause him intense pain. In my mind it works, but if not first mistake now made, so sorry about that.  
I also noticed that the text breaks I had inserted into my draft had not been transferred over when I uploaded the documents, so that is all that has been edited in the past chapters.  
Finally, sorry I didn't update last week time just ran away from me. So two chapters are coming up.**

Remus had been released from the Hospital Wing two days after the one when Severus had practically run out of the aforementioned room. Madam Pomfrey had secretly been worried about the man who was obviously not coping well, but until he opened up to her she felt she couldn't barge in and order him to spill. However something had occurred overnight the evening that Severus had reawakened and the two were much less dismissive of the other's presence. Granted they didn't communicate with each other more than an odd sentence or thrown note, but it was better than she could have hoped for. And Remus was definitely looking less hopeless and devastated, so whatever had occurred had done him some good.

What Poppy didn't realise was Severus that night had grudgingly waved the proverbial white flag on their animosity and now both men felt compelled to at least ensure each other's recovery was assured. Severus had finally admitted that if he was to be accepted into society again he had to learn to be civil again, and if he could help one of his childhood enemies then that would undoubtedly be practice enough. Remus was just overjoyed by the fact someone had found him and shown him a small token of kindness that he almost forgot that it was the 'greasy haired git' that had tried to cheer him up. After a few evenings spent together playing chess in the Infirmary they had progressed from awkward silence to a more companionable one, with Remus no longer feeling like Severus was silently condemning him.

It was a fine Wednesday morning and the grounds were basking in the warm summer sunlight, with just a hint of a breeze. Remus had emerged from his quarters with the intention of taking a slow stroll down to the Black Lake and back to exercise his leg which was still feeling stiff from being shattered in the Battle. On the way through the castle he considered visiting Severus, but he had quickly dismissed that thought as he wasn't confident enough to just barge into his quarters. However as he reached the entrance hall a ripple in the shadows made him stop and look towards the dungeons.

"Have you seen the weather outside today? Fancy going for a light walk?" Remus called lightly to the shadows.

One shadow detached itself from the rest and came into the light and stopped next to the werewolf. The pair slowly ambled out into the sunlight and stopped almost at the same moment to enjoy the unhindered fresh air.

"It's been weeks since I was last outside, it feels great," Lupin said.

Severus nodded his head in agreement and started forward again towards the lake and the monument.

"Have you got a destination in mind?" Lupin noted their walk was more directional than a simple stroll would entail.

"The monument," Severus rasped out.

"You can talk!" Remus stopped dead.

"Ten points to Gryffindor for pointing out the obvious," Severus whispered and carried on walking.

"But you couldn't yesterday, how are you suddenly doing it now?" Remus limped to catch up with him.

"Fawkes paid a visit," Severus scowled as his throat started to become soar.

"That's brilliant, so are the scars gone too?" Severus was almost touched by Remus' happiness for him.

'_I suppose he has had little news to be cheerful about recently, if I'm the only thing he has to make his life more interesting then I pity the man… But then he is the only person entertaining me currently. Gods I've turned soft…'_ Severus muttered in his head before he realised Remus was looking at him expectantly.

With an angry shake of his head Severus strode forward before realising he was alone. Remus was struggling to catch up with him, and for the sake of being courteous to his only acquaintance Severus slowed to wait for him.

"Sorry, I realise that was a bit tactless, it was just great to learn you have made a full recovery. I mean, apart from the scars you haven't got anything to worry about from that encounter which means you will be able to teach without a problem. I really doubt Poppy being right about this sorting itself out," Remus grumbled and he cursed his leg as they walked.

"Trust her, it will," Severus bit out to combat the werewolf's moaning and they carried on in silence.

The lake was further away than both men remembered, and by the time they had reached the nearest bank both were ready to stop and rest. Although Remus was the one with the damaged leg, the seven weeks Severus had been kept caged (either in the Infirmary or in Azkaban) had reduced his fitness and muscle tone down to virtually nothing. If a stranger was to choose which of the two looked more healthy they would have had a hard time picking, as the only boon Severus had was he seemed to look more content with life than Remus.

Silently they agreed that the Monument would have to wait for another day to be visited and they simply sat at the edge of the lake and watched the giant squid laze around close to the surface. It seemed that the entire world was going slowly after the chaos of the last few months, and no one was going to complain about that. Severus unconsciously settled himself more comfortably in a convenient nook in the rock formation they had reached and simply allowed his mind to go blank, revelling in the chance to simply sit there without having to guard his thoughts. A few metres away Remus had also settled down into a more comfortable position and had started snoring lightly.

Snape hadn't even realised he had nodded off until an odd piercing cry pierced his consciousness and dragged him back to reality. Quickly he pulled himself upright and glanced around, using his hearing to zero in on the source of the disruption. After a minute of confusion he located the source of the sound, to what appeared to be a group of birds mobbing one another. As the battling birds drew closer Severus was able to pick out that it was four ravens mobbing a single Buzzard, and by the looks of it the raptor was fast losing energy. Considering both species of birds flew at the same pace, the Buzzard had no hope of outrunning its tormentors and was forced to use precious energy to dodge attacks, and Severus knew that it could not keep it up for much longer. As they watched the Buzzard's wings folded and it started plummeting towards the lake, much to Remus' alarm.

Severus acted practically and quickly cast a cushioning charm and a summoning charm, which brought the bird to the bank. He kept a wary eye out for the ravens, but once the creatures had realised their quarry had fallen and was being approached by humans they abandoned their pursuit and wheeled around to return to their nests within the coniferous trees that they preferred on the far bank of the lake. Immediately after the Buzzard had landed Severus headed over to it and carefully picked it up.

"That was some quick thinking, is it okay?" Remus scrabbled over to look at the bird.

"Badly injured from the ravens and unconscious," Snape hesitated.

"Can't you help it?" Remus asked.

"It's most likely overexerted itself, young fledglings like this shouldn't be forced to fly so far or so fast. The strain to its wings coupled with it's wounds caused it to go into shock, I'm not sure it will live," Snape steeled himself to put it out of its misery.

"You might as well give it the benefit of the doubt for tonight, see if it will pull through," Lupin summoned his cane to his hand and prepared to head back to the castle.

Severus grimaced at the idea but gently held the bird to his body to keep it warm and to restrict its movements should it wake up unexpectedly. Despite Severus trying to not look like he cared his pace picked up and he quickly left Lupin trailing behind him as he swept onwards. By the time Remus arrived at the entrance hall Snape had disappeared, so the werewolf headed straight to his quarters in the dungeons and found the door open for him. Snape had barely been in his quarters five minutes longer than Remus but he had already been productive. A reasonable sized cardboard box had been placed on the table and holes punched around the top of it for air circulation. Lupin quietly approached and found that the Buzzard had been placed inside on a thick towel charmed to keep it warm, with another towel wrapped around it to reduce its movements.

Severus swept back into the room from his private store carrying multiple potions, with a couple of rats which he left on one side of the desk and gently picked the bird up and placed it between the box and the bottles.

For the next ten minutes Severus gently dabbed potions onto the cuts on the bird's body, carefully set the bones in its right wing which he discovered had been broken by the ravens and hesitantly cleaned out its right eye which had been scratched with a talon. Finally he force-fed it a couple of drops of a potion from a pipette to help with the pain and shock. Once he was certain he had done all he could to the bird for now he turned back to the rats. Deftly he summoned a knife and chopping board, and easily severed head and tail before gutting the rodents and then skinning them. Finally he cut them up into roughly centimetre sized cubes and discarded any with large pieces of bone in. After his careful surgery all that was left was a pile of fleshy scraps and organs in a mortar.

"That looks repulsive," Lupin looked slightly pale.

"Nutritious and as close to a normal diet as I can do," Severus shrugged and conjured a pair of blunt tweezers.

As Severus tried, with an unusual amount of care, to gently coax the now partially conscious juvenile to eat small pieces of the mush, Remus took the chance to quickly look around the Potions Master's quarters. The floor was carpeted which surprised the werewolf as he didn't expect a dungeon to be decorated as such, and the walls were the plain dark stone that characterised the dungeons. However most walls were covered with shelves for books and interesting bottles filled with different coloured liquids that refracted light across the room. The light from the fire was now rebound across the room in many colours and shades in a way that made the quarters seem almost cheery. Remus nodded in appreciation of both the artistic stylising of the man and the cleverness of the charm, as even he would never consider turning simple bottles of coloured fluids into light sources.

There were a few deep leather seats and a sofa arranged around the fire with a thick rug placed directly between the hearth and a sturdy coffee table. A dark green wingback chair stood facing the door through which the two men had entered and showed the worst wear of all the furniture, easily pointing out it was the preferred seat for the occupant of the rooms. Severus' private desk was obviously well used from the tracks left in the carpet to it leading from his more public office and to the bedroom door. Remus couldn't help but notice that the desk was so placed that Snape would have his back to the wall and all areas of the room in his sight, with both the bedroom and his office within quick diving range for quick escape routes. But in contrast to this paranoid placing, a more informal table stood almost thoughtlessly placed further from everything with four chairs around it, but all bar one looked relatively unworn. Above the dining table something had been on the wall until recently, and said object was now scattered in pieces over the table and across the floor nearby.

Snape was too busy concentrating on the bird to notice Remus hesitantly shuffle over to the ruined object. However he did hear pieces of stone slowly being picked up from the table and rearranged.

"I'm not a fan of snakes anymore," Severus stated simply in answer to the unspoken question.

"Understandably," Remus said as he left the pieces of the destroyed ornament alone to return to the bird.

"It's warm, been fed and sleeping. Now we can only wait," Severus announced.

"Would you like me to leave?" Remus suddenly asked.

_**You may as well stay, we don't exactly have much to do otherwise and the bird will need feeding in a couple of hours,**_ Severus reverted to pen and paper as his throat started to hurt again.

"How did you know to do all of that? I wouldn't have even considered half of the things you brought to use, and cut up rat would definitely have been the last thing I would have tried to feed it," Remus looked pretty impressed.

_**I did some research years ago, I was thinking about getting a bird but then everything blew up and I wouldn't have had the time for it. There are a few Muggle books out there that are actually very descriptive about how to hand rear birds.**_

"So do you think you could do it, if it survives the night would you be able to keep and train it?" Remus looked genuinely interested in the subject.

_**Maybe, the first few nights will be hard to ensure it stays at the right temperature and stays hydrated. Beyond that it will be a case of whether it is of a favourable nature to be kept, if it stays then I will keep it. It was wild raised but healing that wing will mean it might end up partially imprinted.**_

"Imprinted?" Remus looked lost.

_**Raising any bird by hand will make it think it is a human, and so it won't be able to go back to the wild as it wouldn't have a clue how to survive. If it ends up imprinted by the time its wing is healed then we have no choice to keep it here as it won't be able to go back. Although it has been raised by its own parents, it is young enough to quite easily become imprinted and dependent upon humans.**_ Severus wrote as he mentally sighed in frustration.

"Ah, I see. Well now that I have learnt something today I think I'm going to go back to my rooms for a nap. I never realised how far away the lake actually was," Remus stood up and stretched.

_**Feel free to come and check on the bird whenever, you were part of its rescue so I know you'll want to keep an eye on it. **_Severus almost kicked himself for allowing the man practically unlimited access to his quarters, but for once he realised that Lupin was at least courteous and would not abuse this offer.

"Thank you, I might pop in later in the evening to see if the little fellow is still alive," Remus nodded his thanks to the solemn professor and left.

**~0~**

Lupin was true to his word and knocked gently on the door to Severus' quarters at eight in the evening. Severus himself had just finished eating and the juvenile had awoken but seemed to be reasonably calm despite being wrapped in a towel and sat in a box, so Severus was contemplating feeding it.

_**What are those?**_ Severus passed the note to Lupin as he quickly summoned up a tea set from the House Elves.

"I wrote to a friend in the Muggle world and told him of your new patient, and he thoughtfully sent a few books for you to read if you wanted to refresh your memory," Lupin deposited the three books on the table and took a seat.

_**Who happens to have books on falconry?**_ Severus was intrigued but tried to hide it.

"When I lived amongst Muggles for a bit after leaving Hogwarts I became interested in their history and culture, and apparently dressing up as knights from the dark ages and attacking each other is now considered good fun to participate in and watch. However I was more interested by the falconry display at one of these events and I got talking to the person who was doing it. He quickly figured out that I was more than I let on and I saw no harm in telling him some of the truths. At the very least it has meant I have been able to keep abreast of the Muggle news as well as our own, and with him owning so many birds no one notices an odd owl flying around with letters," Remus admitted.

Severus snorted at the naivety of the Gryffindor before turning his head to the books on the table. One had a Peregrine on the front of the green cover and seemed to cover every possible aspect of falconry, another had a Lanner falcon on the front that again covered everything but with more of a focus on captive breeding and rearing, and another purely on Buzzards.

_**These look reasonably promising,**_ Severus wrote eventually after flicking through them.

"My friend said that if we wanted to we could go visit him for help. He also pointed out that Buzzards are usually easy to work with but hard to train to hunt, so if we wanted help then we are welcome to visit," said the werewolf.

_**We can worry about that if it survives, right now it needs feeding,**_ Severus left the note on the table and headed over to the bird.

Snape was soon absorbed enough in his work that he did not overly mind Lupin staring at him, assuming that it was with interest for his technique in coaxing the bird to eat. However, Lupin was in actual fact staring _at_ Severus, whilst successfully hiding the amazement he felt at seeing the changes that overcame the man. This stern person, who could easily make the most bludger hardened beater cry with a few choice words was looking almost compassionate as he gently held the birds head and directed small clumps of meat into its beak. Gone was the scowl that often graced his face, and the dark glimmer in the eye that usually meant he was plotting his next cutting remark, and was that almost a hint of a smile on his lips? Although Severus had been unusually civil the last week, this was a huge leap forward to being friendly.

"I hope the bird makes it, it'll be a good project for you," Remus blurted out and cursed himself silently.

Severus didn't reply, merely looked over to him with a raised eyebrow.

"Well, you helped me pull back from the brink a bit, and I know that I cannot do the same for you as you don't exactly trust a werewolf who was complicit in many childhood pranks against you. But you need something to make you realise this world has more potential to offer you than just leaving a mentally scarred war hero. I hope the bird pulls through as it will be a reminder to you to get out and live more rather than hide in the dark and brood," Remus blurted out as quickly as possible before muttering an excuse about being tired and limped out of the room as fast as he could.

'_Well that was surprisingly honest, I know people go in for that sort of thing but I would never have pegged him as being one of those types. Perhaps '_The Incident'_ did him more good than I thought,'_ Severus thought as he turned back to the bird.

The Buzzard surprised Severus by pulling through the night and regarded him with an almost indignant expression in the morning as it waited hungrily for food. Considering its alert behaviour, Severus decided to gently bind its wing to its side and tied the bird to a creance so that it could move around his rooms but not get anywhere dangerous, nor damage its wing further by trying to fly. As he sat and read through some of the books the bird did get up and walk around a bit as if to test the limits of its freedom before hopping up onto the log Severus had brought for it and it ruffled its feathers up in distaste before tucking its head down and going to sleep.

Remus visited often and surprisingly was useful in encouraging the bird forward towards a plate of food before coaxing it to eat for itself, and after a week the bird seemed much less afraid of the humans.

"It's becoming imprinted," Severus observed.

"That's a good thing though isn't it?" Remus asked from his seat on the sofa.

"In Muggle law it is illegal to take a wild bird and tame it, and the procedures for keeping a bird that was wild inured and unable to return to the wild are tediously complex making the wild populations that much safer from 'accidental' injury," Severus sighed.

"Good thing that we are not Muggles, this bird wouldn't have made it without you so I think you deserve the chance to keep it. Like you said, if it shows a willingness to stay then keep it. I doubt it would have as easy a life out in the wild as it would here with you. And you might want to consider that it was destined to be your familiar," said Lupin.

"I hadn't thought about that, I wasn't looking forward to having it tied securely somewhere if it was a wild animal," Severus blinked in surprise of his oversight. A familiar would be an ideal explanation as he could give it free roam just like the owls of Hogwarts and it would be intelligent enough to come back.

"Keep treating it the same and see how things progress, if it seems to accept you then cut the string and let it follow you," Remus said happily.

"It's a creance, not a piece of string," Snape said with a sigh.

Two weeks after the accident the humerus bone had healed and Severus had slowly been introducing more natural food items into the juvenile's diet in case it was to go back to the wild. The bird, which they had finally guessed was a male due to its small size, had straight away demonstrated his knowledge of hunting as it always went for the head of the food item first to check it was dead. It took Lupin a lot of effort to convince Severus to give it a test flight as he had grown attached to the bird despite his attempts not to, and even then it was through Remus voicing the idea as a challenge rather than a suggestion.

So, armed with a dragon hide glove on his left fist and a falconry bag (a gift from Remus' friend) slung over his shoulder Severus almost marched out of the dungeons into the courtyard with the Buzzard perched timidly on his fist. Once they reached the middle of the courtyard Severus stopped and cut the creance from the Buzzard's leg and held his fist up. For a few minutes the juvenile simply sat there looking slightly confused by the world, but then a breeze sprung up and the bird almost seemed to remember what he could do. With a bit more flapping than was necessary for a fit bird, the Buzzard took off and timidly started circling the courtyard. After a couple of laps it landed on the roof nearby looking decided tired out.

"Do you fancy coming back to me?" Severus whispered almost desperately as he drew a strip of raw beef from inside the bag and placed it in his gloved hand.

The Buzzard regarded him closely for a few minutes and paced around, as if mimicking the habit Dumbledore had gotten for pacing when making a decision. Eventually Severus sighed and lowered his fist, returned the meat to his bag and walked back to the castle door where Lupin was waiting. He almost wished that the werewolf had not been there to see his humiliating failure, as he was annoyed enough on his own without having someone else pointing out his failures. Suddenly a flurry of feathers flashed in his peripheral vision to his right and solidified into the Buzzard perched smugly on his shoulder.

"Seems like the fist is too much of an unstable perch," Remus smiled delightedly and shook Snape's hand.

And Snape for the first time in many years grinned happily in front of another person.

**A/N: The majority of the falconry details are correct as far as I know, however I'm not well versed on the techniques of treating broken wings, I only remember three cases and only one  
I am referring to **_**Buteo buteo **_**when I say Buzzard, as it is the native species to the UK. The books described are real too, I have them in my own library! Imprinting a Bird of Prey usually takes longer than a week or so, but hey it's magic!**


	9. Chapter 9, September

9 – September

For possibly the first time in many years Severus was actually looking forward to the coming year of school with something other than dread. Yes, there would inevitably the whispers and stares for a while, and he would have to endure a year of students who couldn't probably make tea properly, let alone try making a basic potion, but it meant he had something more to do than just rest under Poppy's most severe orders. His daily excursions with his new familiar made up for much of his cabin fever as seeing his Buzzard float effortlessly on rising currents made him forget his worries. However, the stern yet caring nature of the medi-witch meant Severus was often reminded that he should be taking things easy and rest was more important. Poppy had insisted on him not leaving the grounds, making the man rather unhappy about missing the opportunity to go to Diagon Alley to replenish the severely depleted supplies of potions ingredients (Slughorn had not been as meticulous in ensuring there was always plenty on hand for emergencies) because of her orders and the fact he would probably get assaulted by parents who were less than convinced that he was in fact innocent to many of their imagined crimes.

So when the teachers started to return in order to prepare for the coming year Severus was almost overjoyed enough to hug even Sybil. As it was he had to carefully reintegrate himself into their midst so that they were comfortable to stay eating at the same table as him. It helped that although he had had his voice back for at least a month he couldn't talk for prolonged periods and was often reduced to short answers. That small sign of weakness and his obvious attempts to be less hostile made a few of them soften their demeanour to him slightly. The female teachers also seemed slightly more forgiving of his actions ever since _Witch Weekly_ had gotten hold of the undercurrent of his defence, that he had acted out of love for Lily, and were now portraying him as a misunderstood hero. The thought made him cringe.

It helped that many of the teachers were fascinated with his new familiar which he had called Volare who had insisted on exclusively staying at his side for quite a while making him a good conversation starter. So, with enough bridges patched and on their way to being fully rebuilt, Severus was looking forward to seating himself near the end of the Staff table and letting the Welcoming Feast roll on like it should always have done. However his plan was dashed as Minerva ensured that he was seated to her left, with Remus next to him. Professor Flitwick was seated to her right as his position as the new Deputy Headmaster decreed him to do so for such an event. Professor Sprout had taken over the duties of escorting the first years from the boats to the Great Hall, so the seat to Flitwick's right sat empty for the time being. Hagrid was seated at the end and was making the Muggle Studies teacher feel at home with tales of some of the antics of the students.

"I'm not entirely sure that is the best way to reassure a Professor about their imminent teaching venture," Remus said lightly as they waited for the students to arrive.

"If she can stomach a few wild stories then she will be able to cope with the kinds of students that take Muggle Studies. None of the Weasley spawn took that module so she will earn a reprieve from that at least," Severus stated.

"How are those two doing?" Minerva leaned in on their conversation.

"They are doing quite well, considering the fact they never got the NEWTS needed to actually go into the fields they wanted. Harry and Ron have already got an offer for Auror training through their practical experience in the field. I believe that the individuals that will go on to mentor them are prepared to fill in the gaps in their knowledge as they go. It isn't ideal but the Ministry are desperate to swell the Auror ranks after the war," Remus filled them in.

"And Hermione is returning to gain her NEWTs," Minerva finished with the final member of the Golden Trio.

"Please tell me she isn't taking potions," Severus groaned.

"I was under the impression she was a model student?" Remus said with confusion.

"It is that insufferable trait of hers to need to answer every question that only needs a sentence with a paragraph of detail that is the problem," said Severus as he reached for a drink.

Severus was grateful to the House Elves (most likely Lottie herself) for providing a charmed decanter for him at the table. Ever since he had gotten his voice back and the subsequent strain from talking he had searched for a potion to help with the pain, and surprisingly it had been Remus who provided a soother. So now Severus often drank lemon tea sweetened with honey instead of normal tea or coffee. Despite the effects not being permanent Severus found it a tolerable solution and was happy to drop his research, especially as it had been quite fruitless.

Although Poppy had encouraged him to continue talking to strengthen his throat and stop the pain, Severus was enjoying not being expected to talk much as people were content with him to just observe proceedings rather than try and drag him into them. He was sure that if it came to a life or death situation he could talk easily enough for ages, but he didn't want to let everyone know that.

'_Besides, silence is often a brilliant weapon to unsettle unsuspecting students,'_ Severus' darker side chuckled with anticipation. However his musings were interrupted by the arrival of the students.

Even as soon as the students crossed the threshold to the Great Hall Severus could tell they were undeniably happy to see the school returned to its former glory and all the decorations back up properly. The number of students had also increased due to McGonagall allowing those who had been unable to attend last year to return at the level they had left, meaning that the second year had swollen by half and so had all the other subsequent years. As soon as people had started to seat themselves at their houses the whispering and unsubtle pointing started as people clocked the Potions Master and the rumours started circulating.

'_Why exactly did I look forward to this?'_ Severus stared impassively back at the worst gossipers and mentally noted which students to watch out for.

"Looks like you're going to have even more students avoiding you than usual this year," Remus said as a joke.

"At least it will make getting to breakfast easier," Severus said with a level of confidence he did not feel.

Although he could almost trust his Slytherin's to not attempt retribution upon him, and the Hufflepuffs would be too cowardly to think up such a plan as to attack a teacher; Severus knew that the Gryffindors and Ravenclaws might not be so constrained by fear to not give him hassle. The majority of the Gryffindors most likely knew someone personally who had died in the Battle of Hogwarts, which gave them motive. Ravenclaws, although logical in nature, would most likely run with the logic of 'once a Death Eater, always a Death Eater' and try to make him pay for the last year of hell they had endured.

'_Like I didn't endure it along with you,'_ Snape thought as he caught a glare aimed at him from the aforementioned table.

And the Slytherins? Considering many of them now had deceased or imprisoned relatives whilst he was still alive and walking free was not likely to win him any favours. Although he was their Head of House and therefore commanded some respect, he knew that any attack on him would most likely be subtle as all his students had been drilled that their house stood united to the rest of the school.

"Thinking of investing in a hip flask?" Remus seemed to read his thoughts, remembering Moody's paranoid habit.

"Or I'm just going to only ever eat from the same source as you," Severus sneered.

"And now I'm the poison detector, thanks for the compliment," replied Remus.

Their banter, and the source of amusement for nearby professors, was cut off as the hall had finished filling and the first years filed in, all with the same look of awe on their faces as they saw the Great Hall. Once they had gathered in front of the teacher's table and had listened to the instructions the sorting began. Severus had seen the list of first years entering the school that term and had recognised a few of the names, and had correctly guessed where the child ended up. He was pleasantly surprised to find a few students who seemed to possess potential were sorted into his own house, and not all of them were pureblooded children of distinguished families. Although in the past Severus had liked to have such children in his house, he felt that this year a more varied mix would be useful to make the upper years take a less supremacist stance.

"Before we start with the Welcoming Feast I have a few start of term notices and requests to put to you. First off, I welcome Professor Smith to our school, and she is filling the role of Muggle Studies teacher and I'm sure you will all make her feel welcome. Secondly I would also like to remind all students to consult the Notice Boards in their House Common Rooms for information on the variety of clubs and activities that have already been reinstated for you to get involved with. This year we have decided that it might be beneficial for students to learn how to duel, so a Duelling Club has been organised for any students in the second year and over," McGonagall paused as the room was filled with titters and laughs.

"Yes, the last attempt at such a club was rather disastrous, but this year we have two veterans who are willing to coach you on the art of duelling, they are Professors Snape and Lupin," McGonagall paused again to listen to some of the comments.

"Taught to fight by a Death Eater? No way that's a mad idea!"

"So it is just a ruse to recruit more to his cause?"

"I'm not going within fifty metres of that man if he has a wand drawn!"

Severus was not surprised by the swell of concern; however he did have to hide a grin at the last comment. Obviously not many people knew he could perform wandless magic, and he couldn't wait to start frightening people with that talent.

"I realised that some of you have concerns about this arrangement, but my decision is final on this matter. Severus Snape, who has returned to his position as Head of Slytherin and Potions Master, has my full confidence and that of the Minister for Magic, and I will not tolerate any actions that are enacted against him maliciously. Professor Snape has years of experience in defence and combat making him ideal to teach you how to defend yourselves, and his knowledge of potions is not matched by a single person anywhere in the world. His past may be darkened by his actions as a spy, but if you view the world in black and white alone then you are going to have a difficult time making any friends or progressing in any career," McGonagall said with such a tone of severity Severus actually saw a few of the more cowardly students shrink in their seats.

"And whilst we are on the topic, Professor Remus Lupin is taking the position as Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. Undoubtedly there will be some rumours circulating from the sixth and seventh year students, and I wish to address those now. Yes, Professor Lupin is a werewolf," Minerva was forced to pause as horror swept across the room.

"A Death Eater and a werewolf as their teachers, I'm surprised the Hufflepuffs haven't already legged it out the door," Severus said with a smirk.

"Don't be so damning," Remus chided gently.

"Some of you may be concerned with my decision in staff this year, but that is my concern not yours. Professor Snape will be brewing Wolfsbane potions for Professor Lupin every month which will negate his transformations to nothing more than a violent animagus change. Professor Lupin has agreed that for your peace of mind he will be locked in my office each night of the full moon for safety, and Professors Lupin and Snape will be running a seminar on the specifics of brewing Wolsfbane and its effects on lycanthropy transformations for those who are interested.

"Finally I feel it would be remiss of me not to talk about the events of last year. It was a dark and terrible time for everyone in the wizarding world, for the innocents caught up on both sides of the lines either through fear or disillusion or through situations beyond their control. I would never insult your intelligence by pardoning every evil wizard who sought to destroy our way of life as simply misguided, but I would urge you to learn from the mistakes of your elders. Although simple things like inter-house competition is healthy as it gives you a sense of achievement when you help your housemates win the house cup, you cannot allow such a small thing be blown out of proportions.

"I would urge all of you to seriously consider what I am saying here: we are all gifted with the ability to control magic, and that is all that should matter between ourselves. We have seen what happens when one man's fanatical dreams catch the misguided imaginations of weak-minded lesser men. Whilst I am headmistress of this school I will not tolerate discrimination between my students because of petty things like heritage, nor will I tolerate the old house rivalries to such a degree any more. You have seen what that leads to, and if I have any power to stop events like the last year occurring again then I will act upon it," Minerva sat down as the hall was left silent from her words.

Almost automatically the higher years started to eat the food that appeared, and slowly the hall filled with more happy chatter.

"Well that was rather intense for a start of term speech," Severus said as he passed the sausages to Remus.

"It had to be said, for your protection and also to better our school. I hope you agree that we need to stop the students from alienating each other simply because of the insignia on their robes and get them to focus on unity," Minerva said icily.

"I'm not disagreeing with you, simply stating it was more thought provoking that Albus' ramblings," Severus' voiced thought had more than the two people sitting next to him smiling with fond memories.

"Any thoughts on how we can improve House relations then?" Flitwick asked.

"Severus and I had the beginnings of one, and depending on how things progress it could be a decent venture," Remus began.

"Sounds ominous," Sprout piped up.

"Not in that sense Pomona. If the students show a flair for duelling then we were considering starting a championship. There is a muggle game called Paintballing, and in that game the participants are given portable machines that fire balls filled with paint to simulate the more deadly metal bullets their military forces use. The teams are then set loose to complete challenges like capture the opposing team's flag, or a simple fight to be the last man standing. If enough people are interested from the Duelling Club, we could create equally matched teams from a mixture of houses and let them compete to see who can win. With the stratagem of a Ravenclaw, the bravery of Gryffindor, the determination of Hufflepuff and the cunning of a Slytherin I would think that we could see some truly interesting tactics being used," Remus explained.

"It sounds like an intriguing idea, where would you hold such a tournament?" asked the headmistress.

"We could set up multiple arenas, such as on the edge of the Forbidden Forest, cordon off a level of the dungeons, potentially have a more open setting on the lawns, or temporarily convert the Great Hall for an evening," Severus contributed.

"I like the idea, if you could provide a more solid plan for this venture, and if enough students are interested then I will perhaps allow it," McGonagall decided.

"We better get the attention of everyone in the Duelling Club then," Remus sighed as he realised the workload they had just been given.

"I have a plan, if you are willing to assist me," Severus said with a sly smile on his face.

"I'm not going to like this am I?" Remus shook his head.

**~0~**

The feast finally ended and the students started to noisily clamber to their feet to make their way to their dormitories. Severus had already ensured that his Prefects knew he wanted a house meeting in the Common Room, so quickly swept after the ordered procession which was his house. Although some people viewed it as medieval, Snape liked his house to arrive for breakfast and leave dinner together in an orderly fashion to reinforce the fact they were a united house. No doubt it made other houses think of them as snobbish but the unity had proven to be useful at times when a misguided student settled on insulting one Slytherin which turned into a wall of people from the same house. And despite McGonagall's plan to reduce house animosity, Severus was determined that his house should always be smart and united. The unrivalled organisation in his house even extended to the Common Room which was always immaculate and maintained a good work atmosphere, which meant that many students achieved grades as good as any Ravenclaw, just none of the teachers would acknowledge it.

Severus swept into the Common Room barely two minutes after his students and was pleased to see everyone was assembled waiting for him. Considering the fact the numbers were unusually high this year it was a bit cramped for a House meeting, but no one complained.

"First years, welcome to Slytherin House. Whilst you are at this school this house will be your family, and as such we stand united and proudly together in the face of adversity. I realise that the Headmistress is urging us to be more accepting of your fellow students, and although I endorse this move I feel it would be remiss of me to expect the other houses to be as accommodating. So although I expect you to be cordial and interact with the other houses, I expect your first duty to be to your house and family. If one of you is in trouble, you stand with them to face the problem, even if a sixth year is insulted by another House member, you stand with them. In return your house will help you with your troubles, do not be afraid to ask for help with anything as we are family and look out for each other.

"To the rest of the House, welcome back to the Hogwarts we remember and deserve. Last year may have been dark but we will push forward and forget the past. I doubt the other houses will act as such and may be determined to blame us for what happened, but you must rise above it and ignore their words. Many of your families supported Voldemort or were coerced into doing such, and as a result we must pay for our folly. Our house stands with pride, and shall never beg for forgiveness, but we must accept that the rest of the school may happily try to demonstrate their anger at the last year. If anything of such nature occurs then you are to report it directly to me as I will not tolerate discrimination against you simply because of the actions of your elders. You were innocent of the events that have occurred, and I expect you to prove to the school that you are not your parents, and you are not me.

"Unless there are any questions I shall leave it to Prefect Mulcher to finish explaining to you first years what happens in our house and in the school in general," Severus paused and mentally winced as a few hands shot up and he realised he was going to be speaking for a long while yet.

"Yes, Miss Brown," Severus chose a moderately intelligent sixth year to start with.

"Are we really to be taught by Professor Lupin?" the girl almost spat.

"I agree it is highly unconventional, but Professor Lupin endangered his life to help destroy Voldemort and has gained the respect of his peers and the powers that be in the Ministry. Right now werewolves are probably as welcome in society as Death Eaters and their sympathisers, so his presence is not that surprising. I got to know the man better through the summer and he will be a better teacher to you than the majority of the numbskulls the school has hired in the last five years. And trust me, I _will_ be forcing Wolfsbane down his throat at a far more regular occurrence than is needed to render his transformations harmless," Severus answered honestly and with a tone that said he would broker no arguments. "Mr Dorian?"

"Is it true sir, what was written in the _Prophet_?" the boy blushed and looked down at his feet.

"I'm not going to be able to leave without addressing this, am I?" the professor's resigned (rather than angry) voice made many of them snap their heads to him in shock. "You are my house and my family so you deserve to know the truth, however I will not be pleased with you if you break my trust by telling the rest of the school about this.

"Roughly twenty years ago I joined the Death Eaters because of my foolish quest for power to get back at some of my peers. However pretty quickly I realised that the Dark Lord was an insane man who would not share his power and only tolerated me due to my prowess with potions. Although this talent gave me a high position amongst the Death Eaters it was not what I wanted, and it cost me my soul. This man would not stop his campaign of hatred until only purebloods remained, which made me and even himself redundant. I could not stand to see this hypocritical megalomaniac rule my soul anymore, so to repent for my errors I turned spy for Dumbledore and fed Voldemort half truths about Dumbledore's plans whilst getting as much information about attacks for the good side.

"Once the Dark Lord rose for the second time I was thrust back into leading a double life as a spy and was forced to dance between two masters. You try having to avoid getting killed by your insane master whilst having to deal with an irritating old fool who also owns your soul and then deal with students who seem determined to destroy my classroom, and then see if you are cheerful by the end of it.

"Yes, I did kill Dumbledore but at his orders. He had been cursed earlier in the year with something that neither of us could remove, and he was slowly succumbing to that curse so death by my hands was quick and painless compared to what was in store for him. However, Dumbledore had been in possession of the Elder Wand, and although Voldemort had retrieved it from his tomb it was not obeying him. Realising I had killed Dumbledore, the Dark Lord decided that I had to be eliminated to ensure he had the complete power he wanted. All my loyal services were rewarded by a slow and painful exit from this life after Nagini had finished attacking my throat. However, it did the Dark Lord little good as Malfoy had already disarmed Dumbledore by the time I had arrived, and Potter had done the same to Malfoy earlier on so in fact Potter owned the Elder Wand and was able to kill Voldemort.

"I do not know how I survived, I just remember waking up in an antechamber amongst the other dead defenders of the castle and they found me breathing. After that the Ministry tried me but my memories provided sufficient evidence for me to be released, where upon the Headmistress offered me my job back on the condition I only ever use my powers in defence of the school."

"Does she think we could be in danger then?" a first year by the name of Oliver Gregory piped up.

"Not necessarily, there are still many followers of the Dark Lord roaming free attacking Wizarding settlements and she feels it would be prudent to have someone able to point out the flaws to their strategies somewhere easily found in case the Ministry ever needed my help. As you can probably imagine the Ministry is running low on Aurors at the moment, so I was the next best thing.

"Now if that has satisfied your curiosity I shall leave you to settle in. I expect you to think on my words about us all turning over a new leaf in regards to your behaviour and attitude towards the other houses. I do not expect you to go and hug them, but try to hide your exasperation at their idiotic tendencies and try not to insult them. I expect you to at least be cordial to them in classes and try to not be too antagonistic. Also if I hear any reports of you insulting 'Mudbloods' then the repercussions will make you wish you had never even heard the word. See you at breakfast at 7.30, goodnight," and with that Severus swept from the Common Room.

**~0~**

Severus' first class of the year was with the newest students of the school, which was unusual. Perhaps the timetabling had been arranged so that he couldn't build up enough anger to fully lash out and make the whole class cry. Snape found the notion amusing as even on a good day he could always muster enough sarcasm and anger to make even the bravest Gryffindor afraid to look at him. Today had so far gone quite well, so he was going to go easily.

"You will not find this class like any other in the school, there will be no wand waving and no repetitive mumbling of spells in the vain hope that constant repetition of the same mistakes will produce a different outcome. Potion brewing can be some of the most deadly or rewarding skills to master, if you have the aptitude for it. One mistake in your potion could produce a toxic vapour that would kill us all instantly, and if we make it through a month without one of you melting a cauldron you will have achieved what no other batch of first years have managed. Be warned, if you even consider sabotaging another student's potion or make a mistake through your own lack of concentration then you will feel the full force of my wrath," Severus was quite pleased with his revised speech. He had toned it down slightly from his customary speech but he felt it still carried enough threat to make the students perk up their ears and pay attention.

"Is that how you survived," One impertinent child piped up from the back, before the entire class froze in fear.

Snape had just turned his back to the room to put the lessons instructions on the board, and similarly froze.

"Are you insane? You don't just ask something like that!" Another voice whispered to the first boy, probably not as subtly as the owner intended.

"Insane or brave, but either way he is a Gryffindor so both are equally plausible. But to question me is a daring feat not many students would do, as you will learn. Five points from Gryffindor for your lack of etiquette Hollis, and for not thinking that I would not hear you Guice. And no I did not use a potion to cheat death, I have no idea how I survived," Severus swiped his wand in the direction of the blackboard and the lesson plan appeared. "Read chapters one and two, and make notes on safety whilst brewing. If you do not absorb the advice given in the books then we will most likely be killed by your idiocy later on in the year."

The two Gryffindors glowered at their desks as the students began, but everyone seemed relieved that the infamous potions teacher had so far been relatively calm. Snape himself was surprised that he hadn't been more angry at the boys, but he contented himself with the fact that fewer crying students could only be a good thing for his image with the rest of the school and he let matters lie. Besides, he had been able to deduct points from his least favourite house already, which always put him in a good mood. For a few minutes he returned to his desk and took a few swigs of his lemon tea before pacing around the class and making sure everyone was working hard.

The first years were glad to abandon that class when the lesson ended, and Severus was still proud that he had managed to find a justified excuse to take points from some Gryffindors. Despite his agreeing with Minerva about the toning down of house rivalries, he still enjoyed being able to put the idiots back in their place for a justifiable excuse. Snape exited his classroom and swept into the grounds to work on a project he and the werewolf had devised to assist with their plan for the first Duelling Club meeting later in the week. This project involved drawing a large circle in the ground and placing runes around the inner edge of the circle, and over the next few days he would pour as much spare magic as he could into creating wards around the circle. Remus was going to do the same, and surprisingly Minerva had offered to help once she heard of their plan.

'_She's never going to be content to let things lie anymore, if anything she will be able to rival me in terms of paranoia before long,'_ Severus thought as he reached their pet project and carried on strengthening the wards. He was secretly delighted when Volare swooped down and alighted on his shoulder to watch, and once he was finished he spent a while giving the bird some attention.

The rest of the years Snape faced were less neutral in their views of Snape, as the majority of them had experienced Hogwarts under his rule the year previous. Understanding that fact, Severus reined in his anger and forced himself to be at least partially more respectful of his students. Many were not fooled, but were also not foolish enough to confront a powerful wizard in the middle of his domain. Despite their stigma against him, it was obvious that Slughorn had not been as good a teacher as he had been, as a few NEWT students almost looked on the verge of being grateful he was teaching them again. By the end of the week Severus had identified around twenty students that he would have to keep an eye on, ten of which he would not put it past them to try to attack him, and the rest would at least attempt to hex him at some point. Overall, he was feeling quite positive about the remainder of the year, and with their project coming along nicely he was quite looking forward to Friday evening.


	10. Chapter 10, The Dueling Club

10 – The Dueling Club

**After my lax posting last week, this Friday's chapter is coming up early! I'm going back to my uni for an extended weekend to finalize some details for my dissertation so will be a bit too busy hunting down lecturers to post tomorrow. Thanks for reading!**

The third Friday evening of term had arrived, which meant the first Duelling Club meeting was going to happen in a matter of hours and had the entirety of the school chatting excitedly and with some trepidation. Remus and Severus had fallen into the habit of sitting next to each other at mealtimes were to be seen deep in discussion at dinner which only increased the student's curiosity about that evenings events. A quick survey done a few days prior had made it clear that the majority of the school would be attending the Duelling Club, so Remus had asked a few other teachers to be present to simply ensure there would be enough sources of encouragement and advice to make the event worthwhile for every student that attended.

"It'll probably reassure the students that the Death Eater isn't going to kill them all," Severus gritted his teeth as the two of them waited in the staff antechamber behind the Great Hall for all the students to arrive.

"They don't think of you like that," Remus tried to start.

"Like they don't think of you as a werewolf. The only difference is you can plead innocence as you were bitten as a child in an attack against your father. I willingly chose to ally myself to that insane man, even if I did regret it in the end and help your side," Spat the dark haired man.

"Then we better make sure that we prove to them that you are a better ally than enemy. Ready?" Remus smiled in excitement before he opened the door and stepped into the hall.

Severus bit back a retort and smoothly followed the other professor , but decided to hang back a bit from the suspicious students who were eagerly swarming towards Lupin. Despite his secret being out, the majority of the students had accepted him and were eager to learn from him regardless of his monthly activities. It helped that the sixth and seventh year students had openly embraced him as a good teacher, so the lower years followed their example.

"Welcome all of you to our first Duelling Club meeting! Before we start I'm going to set a few ground rules so that we can continue this club in a safe fashion and so that we don't bring down the wrath of Madam Pomfrey too early into our Club. We all know that would be a terrible idea, don't we?" Remus remarked.

A few students tittered at a professor being scared of the strict medi-witch whilst the rest of the hall laughed and Severus tried not to throw up at this camaraderie Lupin was creating.

"So firstly, you may only use spells and jinxes that you are taught at school, between Professor Snape and I we know all the others that are of less good repute and if we catch you using them then you will be banned from the Club, no second chances. Secondly no physical fighting, this is a wizarding duel so only spells may be used to overpower your opponent. Thirdly if you are paired with a lower year, be mindful of their limited knowledge of duelling and be courteous towards them, do not mercilessly attack them and then gloat over the fact that all you succeeded in doing is defeat a much younger opponent. Finally, if we give the order to stop then that means immediately; no sneaky attacking of anyone else in the room, no continuing a duel, and no exacting revenge if you lost. If something goes wrong we need you to be responsible and obey our order so that we can quickly help those who might be injured.

"Right, now that the boring bit is over we thought we would start with a practical demonstration," Remus paused as the room was filled with excited whispering and confused looks.

"Yes, you may have noticed the lack of a duelling platform tonight, and that is because for this demonstration we are heading outside. Through the past couple of weeks Severus and I have been working on a warded duelling ring and, with the assistance of all the other teachers, we have reinforced it enough to contain the power we will be unleashing in a full duel. I would like to remind you that you shall _only_ be using jinxes and hexes that you have learnt through school, and any attempt to replicate the ones we will use in example duels will lead to at least you being banned from the club. Yes, Miss Smith?" Remus pointed to a Hufflepuff with her hand up.

"So who is going to be duelling?" she asked hesitantly.

"Severus has agreed to duel me," Lupin said as many people gasped.

"But he's a Death Eater, he's going to kill you!"

"He's never going to fight fair!"

"Professor that is an insane idea, don't do it!"

"Enough!" For the first time in months Snape raised his voice and the entire room went deathly silent.

"I've endured your single-mindedness for long enough. If you thought I wanted to kill him then why would I wait to do it publicly in front of the entire school? You forget that I've been a spy for longer than you have been alive, and I know so many more subtle ways to get things done than you will ever learn during your time here as you try to sneak around the school at night or attempt to weasel you way out of detentions. I've had more experience than anyone at learning how a Death Eater thinks and acts in a fight, so for a realistic duel I'm the best candidate to show you how not everyone plays by the rules. But if you think that I am malicious enough to intentionally murder a teacher in front of all of you then you are extremely stupid," Severus hissed and the students visibly flinched.

"Not to mention the fact that Professor Snape was the one who came up with the wards that protect that duelling ring, even if something did go wrong there are wards to stop both participants from being mortally injured, and the amount of magical energy poured into it will mean that nothing we can throw at it will penetrate the shielding. Satisfied? Good then let's go," Remus hopped from the steps and led the way out of the Great Hall.

There was still a great deal of dark muttering about a Death Eater being allowed to duel, but for the most part the students were intrigued by the promised duel and hurried to get a good spot to watch the match. Once at the ring Remus instructed the kids to stand a foot back from the circle and to not move any closer. Severus quietly glided through the cowed students and took his position in the ring with Remus and silently raised the wards whilst his opponent was buys arranging the students.

"How do you know it will hold?" a student called in fear.

"Because it will," Snape barked and before anyone could stop him he had conjured a jet of fiendfyre that roared forth and struck against every side of the protective bubble.

Some students screamed in alarm at the sight and jumped back, but the shields flashed like lighting and held easily. After a few seconds Severus cancelled the spell and was left standing next to the werewolf in the middle of the duelling ring completely unharmed.

"Satisfied?" Severus sneered as Lupin walked to the other side of the ring.

"You could have just verbally reassured them," Remus admonished as he drew his wand.

"They wouldn't have believed me, and besides that was more fun," Severus replied, not caring about the reaction his words caused.

"Okay, for this duel only we will be using everything and anything that we know to attempt to outwit and overpower our opponent. Again, I'm reiterating that anything you witness here _shall not_ be used in your own duels because they are dangerous and can easily kill an unsuspecting student who has not learnt the counter spell. Professor's Flitwick and Sprout have agreed to watch as referees and in case something does go wrong, as we have not rehearsed this and something could go wrong. For the purpose of this duel only, anything is accepted, apart from the Unforgivable Curses, agreed," Remus nodded to Severus.

"Certainly," Severus flicked his wrist and his wand slid from its holster on his arm down into his hand again. "Would a referee like to call it?"

"Duellers prepare," Flitwick's voice rang out. As a champion at duelling it was only sensible that he acted as referee. "3, 2, 1, Begin!"

Lupin started off predictable and attempted to disarm Snape with a quickly shouted _'Expelliarmus!'_ which was easily deflected into the shield where it dissipated across the wards. Severus retaliated almost idly flicked his wand towards Lupin and muttered _'expulso'_ almost gently. Despite his careful execution of the spell Lupin was blasted backwards into the barrier and landed on his back, but was quickly on his feet again.

Remus' eyes narrowed slightly as he looked at Severus' triumphant look before quickly conjuring chains to appear and attempt to wrap around his legs to secure him in one spot. Severus made the mistake of looking down and severed them with a quick snap of his wand, but was only just in time to look up and throw a protective shield up to rebound the stunning spell Remus had sent after the chains. Severus gritted his teeth and transfigured the shredded chains into tiny ravens that sped towards Remus, who easily destroyed them with a quickly shouted _'Reducto!'_

As Severus and Remus began to settle back into the feeling of intense duelling the types of spells changed and soon more varied spells were being traded without pause as the pace picked up. A variety of stunning, disarming and illusionary charms began to fly between the two as both attempted to beat the reflexes of the other and win through speed rather than power. Snape kept a tight smile on his face as he felt confident that he would win this battle. He knew many curses that would ensure this battle would finish quickly, but he wanted to let the students see how strong both of them were.

A well timed disarming spell saw both of their wands sailing through the air, and left Remus stumbling forward to scoop his wand up before Severus could catch him unprepared. However Severus was suddenly concerned as he saw his wand gently roll across the line that bordered the duelling ring and out of play. They had designed the wards to ensure no curses, bodies or debris could penetrate the shield during combat, but somehow they had naively overlooked including wands into that mix.

'_Or perhaps Remus had planned this? He is much sneakier than I expected if that is the case,'_ Severus abandoned his wand and turned back to the match.

A ripple ran through the students as they realised Severus' wand had landed out of the ring, and that he was now defenceless. But they were mistaken when they thought that the man was now defeated, as he quickly proved to them all that even a wandless wizard was not something to dismiss.

The potions master threw a barrage of stinging and stunning spells towards the werewolf who was forced to deflect and dodge them, and those actions forced him forward slightly from the barrier. Judging the distance to be sufficient, Severus executed his plan and pointed a finger at the floor just in front of Remus and shouted _'Bombarda!'_ The resulting explosion tore up a large chunk of earth that flew up into the air, with Remus catapulted backwards onto the floor again. As the lumps of mud rained down on the pair many of the students shouted in alarm as Remus was motionless on the floor.

'_I couldn't have misjudged that spell, I knew the range and power in that explosion and Lupin wasn't in any harm. Maybe a rock struck him?'_ Severus gingerly edged forward to better see if his opponent was harmed.

Suddenly Severus felt himself being catapulted backwards through the air as Remus leapt up to a roar of approval from the crowd. Despite feeling foolish for being tricked, Snape was immensely glad he hadn't made a mistake and felt happy to continue the duel.

It seemed that the inclusion of more violent spells had prompted Lupin to change from the lighter spells they had been using to a more darker approach. He conjured his own fiendfyre torrent that rushed towards Severus, who simply stood there as the lion shaped curse roared towards him. A few students screamed in fear as they thought they were about to watch a man burn to death in front of them. But at the last moment, Severus called the rubble from the ground up and created a shield reinforced with magic to protect him. The lion shaped fire battered uselessly against the shield until Remus cancelled the spell. That was the pause Severus had needed, as he violently flung the mud and rocks back at Lupin at a high velocity, forcing him to throw himself to the ground to avoid the projectiles.

As Remus gained his footing again Severus could see something in his eye, and realised the battle was about to step up another notch.

'_Bombardo Maxima!'_ Remus shouted, pointing directly at Severus' feet.

Sprout and Flitwick gasped at the implications of such an action within a confined shell, but then flinched and ducked like every student as the duelling ring erupted into a mess of flying mud and stone. As the rubble rebounded into the ring and settled on the ground again everyone looked around for the potions master, and was surprised to find he had remained where he was, in a metre circle of calm as the rest of the ground was completely ruined. Even Remus seemed shocked that such a powerful spell hadn't even made the man budge. Severus used the few seconds pause to point his hand at the floor and started muttering a long stream of words.

Suddenly the rubble convulsed and coalesced into the form of a ten foot long snake that reared up and hissed at Remus. Anyone who had been in the Battle of Hogwarts noted the resemblance to Nagini and shouted in fear. The snake lunged towards Remus' throat and suddenly dissolved back into the mud from which it was conjured, leaving more than a few students confused at the purpose of such a move. For a few moments no one knew why the duelling had stopped, and then they realised why it was over. Severus had used the distraction to shroud himself in shadow and snuck around to Remus and had now placed his hand gently on the man's throat.

"Duellers halt, match goes to Professor Snape," Flitwick announced.

The astonished silence continued for a few moments before polite clapping started cautiously from a few Hufflepuffs. The Slytherins quickly joined in more vigorously and the rest of the students did too, although as timidly as the Hufflepuffs. Severus let go of Remus' neck and mumbled a few spells to lower the wards around the ring. As soon as the barriers dropped he summoned his wand to his hand and holstered it against his forearm where it belonged.

Lupin sighed heavily and turned to his duelling partner, offering his right hand. "Good duel, I didn't realise you were so creative,"

"You were surprisingly cunning with some of those moves, I thought members of the Order were supposed to not waste time dragging out a duel when it could be helped?" Severus shook hands with him.

"I'll leave it to the students to simply go for overpowering their opponent, I thought they should see that it is better to be unpredictable and creative in a fight so that no one knows what you will do next," Remus said with a grin before he turned back to the students.

"Right everyone, that is an example of a restrained duel," Remus was cut off by cries of confusion.

"_That_ was restrained?!"

"That was insane!"

"If it was a real fight to the death there are much more severe curses that would have been used, which would have left at least one of us dead, and the other potentially very severely wounded," Remus began to explain.

"Professor Lupin, if I might make a suggestion?" Snape's oily tones interrupted him again. Remus' silent glance of approval let him continue. "I shall return to the circle and can demonstrate some of the more powerful spells that could have been used. If you could conjure some kind of target for me to utilise?"

Remus exited the ring and started a muttering a spell, and soon a marble statue of some long forgotten mythical hero stood in his position in the duelling ring. Severus remained inside and started chanting to raise the wards around the ring. Remus did a quick check on their status before surreptitiously adding extra strength to them from the outside in case Severus got carried away. Sprout and Flitwick noticed his actions and also muttered a few spells along with him, giving the ring extra security.

"You must never underestimate your opponent, or give them the benefit of assuming they will play fair. For the purposes of the Duelling Club we will be focussing on making sure you can defend yourselves properly, but to make sure you are fully paying attention to what we are trying to teach you I think you need a visual reminder of just what you could face if you intend to be Aurors. Remember these are to never be used by you under any circumstances unless you truly face a life or death situations, although I doubt you could learn them as I'm going to cast them silently. Anyone of a nervous disposition or with an overactive imagination should leave right now," Severus paused to allow anyone to leave, but none did.

A few seconds later every student realised why such a warning had been given as the marble statue was subjected to gouging, lacerations, burns, breaking limbs and more. As the exhibition of exactly what could occur during a duel to the death continued, Remus started to become seriously worried if he had misplaced his trust in Severus. The man's eyes were filled with hatred and he wasn't holding back on the curses which were flying faster and thicker now, making the arena almost strobe with light. Eventually Remus caught Snape's face contort with utter rage and he actually snarled at the statue, before causing it to rip apart as if pulled by many unseen hands.

No one spoke as they saw the remains of the statue fall to the floor and the stream of magic finally ceased. Severus remained frozen in place until eventually he lowered his wand and stepped up from his duelling stance. Everyone could see him visibly try to rein in his anger and they were surprised when he silently strode off into the dark grounds of the castle, the students in front of him parted fearfully as he left.

"Right, well now you know you should never underestimate a truly Dark Wizard. We still have half an hour left before the end so if you would like to follow me back to the castle we can start on disarming each other," Remus said quickly as Severus disappeared into the darkness.

The students did not seem too keen on the idea of staying out in the dark where an angry ex-Death Eater was lurking so in record time they were all back in the Great Hall with Flitwick and Lupin teaching them the basics. Pomona decided to stay behind and look for Snape to ensure he hadn't gotten too out of control. As she carefully navigated the ruined duelling ring to head in the direction in which Severus had disappeared she accidentally nudged something with her foot which moved with a wooden clatter. Bending over and grasping the object she realised that Snape had abandoned his wand as he left, which shocked her and made her all the more determined to find the man.

Severus was not paying any attention to where his feet took him, he just wanted to get as far away from that mannequin as possible. The secret to being a successful Death Eater was conjuring enough hatred to pour into the spells to make them powerful, and his method of summoning such hatred was imagining he was trying to destroy Voldemort. However that idea now brought up the memories of Nagini in the boathouse and he had rather overstepped the average level of anger he would use. And the fact he had been so absorbed in his hatred to the point he could have destroyed the wards with the strength of his spell and lack of control had caused frightened him more than facing death had.

His pace only slowed when he stumbled on a hidden rock and he had to steady himself against a tree to avoid falling headfirst to the ground. Deciding it was an opportune moment to rest and try to calm down he sat on a boulder nearby and took stock of his surroundings. His agitated roaming had inadvertently brought him to the monument next to the lake, its black granite face reflecting the meagre moonlight to him. The Black Lake was calm due to the lack of wind and Severus lost himself to his thoughts as he stared at the calming waters.

'_I'm never going to be free of that bastard and what he did to me; every day something is going to remind me of something I did or a person I killed or someone who sacrificed themselves to stop him. And now because I let myself go the entire school is going to petition to get me kicked out, some great work I've done there. What would I do if I had to leave?'_ Severus managed to calm himself down but ended up just being miserable instead.

It was in this state that Pomona finally discovered him half an hour later with his head in his hands still sitting on the same boulder. Volare had appeared at some point and was sitting next to his human, looking confusedly up at him.

"I should have thought that you might end up here, do you realise how hard it is to follow you in the dark," Professor Sprout said gently as she cautiously approached Severus.

"You shouldn't have followed at all," Snape tried to snap back, but it only came out as a mumble.

"Someone had to come and check you were okay, you seemed pretty shaken up back there," Sprout stopped a few paces in front of the seated man.

"You just needed to check I haven't snapped and likely to go on a killing spree," Snape muttered.

"Severus stop this wallowing in self-pity, it doesn't suit you," the usually mild woman snapped at him.

The man managed to school his reaction so he only sighed and looked up, but in reality he was quite surprised by Professor Sprout's tone. It was the one she only ever used two or three times a year when a student endangers others in her classes.

"Sorry, but could be a valid assumption after that accidental outburst," Severus budged up a bit to allow Pomona to share his boulder. Volare took the hint and flew up to the nearest branch to watch over his human.

"We all know that you are not capable of doing such a thing, however I doubt you are going to have any trouble from the students for a few months at least," Pomona said with a smile on her face.

"The students have not been the problem, but I would bet my last galleon their parents will not be pleased with the events of tonight," Severus replied with honesty.

"Dumbledore had always approached the education of his students to the dangers they could face with the same view you have, they must be aware that discretion is the better part of valour if they ever came face to face with Death Eaters," Pomona was surprised that Severus was being so open with her.

"He had the trust of the wizarding world and even _he_ got letters of concern from parents. The arrival of the post is not going to be an enjoyable experience for the next couple of days," Severus smiled grimly.

"You know how to neutralise Howlers, it won't be too bad. Come on, let's head back before Remus truly starts worrying about you," Pomona stood.

"Why do you care about me? I've never been anything but civil to you," Severus suddenly asked.

"I know that you aren't the kind of person you pretended to be, but you had to seem to be through circumstances we all faced. You aren't a spy any longer and He isn't coming back this time so you can finally be yourself. I know it was all an act but you don't need to be so intimidating anymore, the staff won't hold grudges considering what you did is something none of us could have accomplished. Despite your hostile exterior, no evil man could have a Buzzard as a familiar," and the Herbologist teacher held out his wand for him to take.

Severus smiled at her optimism and accepted his wand back before rising to his feet to follow her back, Volare once again perched on his favourite spot on his human's shoulder.


End file.
